English Language Discussion Forums


Go Back   UsingEnglish.com ESL Forum > Learning English > Editing & Writing Topics > CVs, Resumes and Applications

Quick Links
Sites for Teachers


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 07-Feb-2005, 21:00
Pawel_26
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default CV and cover letter

Hi,

Could you check and correct my CV and cover letter, please?

The text of my cover letter:


7 February 2005

Dear Ms./Mr. ...........................

I found out from the www.reed.co.uk web site of your need for an data entry clerk. I am sure that my recently completed education and work experience make me a strong candidate for the position. Please find attached a copy of my CV.

I graduated from the Warsaw School of Economics in 2004 with a Master’s degree in Business Administration. It is the best school of economics in Poland. While working towards my Master’s degree I was employed as an office worker in Commune Office in Poland. I gained a broad knowledge of working within office environment. I worked as a part of a team and I received a lot of compliments from my co-workers. I am convinced that my education and work experience have prepared me for the position in Your company. As Poland is a member of the European Union I need no work permit to work in the United Kingdom.

I am open and communicative but at the same time exact and have a sense of duty. I tend to get very engaged in all my activities, even if they are after hours. I am an enthusiastic worker, and enjoy working in a team.

The position you outline is one, which I feel can enhance my practical background. I am sure I could apply the combination of my knowledge and experience to your business. I would welcome the opportunity to discuss the job vacancy with you on the telephone or at an interview. I can be contacted most easily on my mobile or by e-mail (see details at the top of this letter).

Yours sincerely,

Pawel Wozniak



The text of my CV:


CURRICULUM VITAE

Personal data:

name: Pawel Wozniak
address: ul. Zamkowa 120, 00-250 Warsaw
date of birth: 10 March 1978
e-mail: EMAIL REMOVED - Send PM to This User Instead
phone: 0048 22 123 45 67

Education:

2002 - 2004 Warsaw School of Economics, Warsaw, Poland
Master's Degree in Business Administration
1999 - 2002 Higher School of Finance and Banking, Radom, Poland
Bachelor's Degree in Business Administration

Work experience:

11.2000 - 05.2001 Commune Office, Jasieniec, Poland
office worker in the Local Development Department; mainly office work (worked as part of team involved in the development of the local area)

Skills and Other:

languages: Polish - native
English - very good (knowledge of Business English)
Russian - conversational
computer skills: perfect: MS Office (Word, Excell, Access, Power Point),e-mail, Internet; very good: Adobe Photoshop CS, Paint Shop Pro, Effective Site Studio (making www sites), ability to work with various operation systems
hobbies: books, Internet, computers, history of the Second World War, biking
others: driving licence

Other activities:

2000 - 2001 preparing articles for the local newspaper
1994 - 1999 member of the local football team


Thanks in advance for your help
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #2  
Old 08-Feb-2005, 03:35
Editor, UsingEnglish.com
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Country: UK
Posts: 27,067
Current Location: Phnom Penh
First Language: English
Member Type: English Teacher
Tdol has disabled reputation
Default Re: CV and cover letter

Could you check and correct my CV and cover letter, please?

The text of my cover letter:

7 February 2005

Dear Ms./Mr. ........................... (no need for a full stop in BrE when the abbreviation ends with the last letter of the word, so Mr ...., but Rev. ....)

I found out from the www.reed.co.uk web site of your need for an data entry clerk. I am sure that my recently completed education and work experience make me a strong candidate for the position. Please find attached a copy of my CV.

I graduated from the Warsaw School of Economics, the finest school of economics in Poland (Pawel, I did this because the way you had it looked a bit simplistic) , in 2004 with a Master’s degree in Business Administration. While working towards my Master’s degree I was employed as an office worker in (the???- I'm not sure what this office is) Commune Office in Poland, where I gained a broad knowledge of working within an office environment. I worked as a part of a team and I received a lot of compliments from my co-workers (I don't like this much- they could have been saying you were wearing nice trousers- how about and received positive feeback from my co-workers??). I am convinced that my education and work experience have prepared me for the position in your company. As Poland is a member of the European Union, I need no work permit to work in the United Kingdom.

I am open and communicative but at the same time exacting (what do you mean by exact here- I'm not sure I get it) and have a sense of duty. I tend (sounds weak-I am very involved in all my activities??) to get very engaged in all my activities, even if they are after hours. I am an enthusiastic worker, and enjoy working in a team.

The position you outline is one (no comma) which I feel will (do you enhance them or do they enhance you?? )enhance my practical background. I am sure I could apply the combination of my knowledge and experience to your business. I would welcome the opportunity to discuss the job vacancy with you on the telephone or at an interview. I can be contacted most easily on my mobile or by e-mail (see details at the top of this letter).

Yours sincerely,

Pawel Wozniak (I'd be tempted to put Mr here, as they might not know- I'm assuming from the Czech name Pavel that you're male)



The text of my CV:


CURRICULUM VITAE

Personal data:

name: Pawel Wozniak (Use sentence case- Name, etc)
address: ul. Zamkowa 120, 00-250 Warsaw
date of birth: 10 March 1978
e-mail: EMAIL REMOVED - Send PM to This User Instead
phone: 0048 22 123 45 67

Education:

2002 - 2004 Warsaw School of Economics, Warsaw, Poland
Master's Degree in Business Administration
1999 - 2002 Higher School of Finance and Banking, Radom, Poland
Bachelor's Degree in Business Administration

Work experience:

11.2000 - 05.2001 Commune Office, Jasieniec, Poland
Office worker in the Local Development Department; mainly office work (worked as part of team involved in the development of the local area)

Skills and Other:

languages: Polish - native (Again, capitalise the first word, IMO)
English - very good (knowledge of Business English)
Russian - conversational
computer skills: perfect (I'd say proficient, not perfect, or highly proficiant- can anyone be perfect????) : MS Office (Word, Excell (Probably not perfect if you spell it wrong- Excel ), Access, PowerPoint),e-mail, Internet; very good: (to be honest, I'd probably lump them all together as proficient, rather than being so exact) Adobe Photoshop CS, Paint Shop Pro, Effective Site Studio (making www sites), ability (able) to work with various operation systems
hobbies: books, Internet, computers, history of the Second World War, biking
other skills: clean driving licence

Other activities:

2000 - 2001 preparing articles for the local newspaper
1994 - 1999 member of the local football team

Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-Feb-2005, 19:01
Pawel_26
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: CV and cover letter

Thank you tdol. I really appreciate your help.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 09-Feb-2005, 02:34
Editor, UsingEnglish.com
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Country: UK
Posts: 27,067
Current Location: Phnom Penh
First Language: English
Member Type: English Teacher
Tdol has disabled reputation
Default Re: CV and cover letter

Good luck with the job.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
cover, letter

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Thank you for your correction of my resume and cover letter Athena_zhao CVs, Resumes and Applications 17 08-Dec-2006 02:24
Arc's cover letter and resume Justin_Yang CVs, Resumes and Applications 2 12-Sep-2006 17:44
please help me with my cover letter and resume xinshock CVs, Resumes and Applications 6 18-Oct-2004 17:43
how to write a cover letter? Anonymous CVs, Resumes and Applications 1 16-Oct-2004 10:56
a cover letter wpqin Ask a Teacher 5 06-Mar-2003 16:39


All times are GMT. The time now is 07:35.


vBulletin, Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.0
Copyright © 2002 - 2009 UsingEnglish.com