Need my CV read, too :-)

Hi, I need little help witch my CV.

I want to study abroad and unfortunately I am not a native speaker.
Thnanks very much in advance.
Babak

Personal Details

Phone

Mobile Phone

E-Mail EMAIL REMOVED - Send PM to This User Instead

Date and place of birth 1980 in Tehran, Iran

Work experience

Jan to May 2005 Student apprentice at the AP-Luftfilter Brandenburg,
GmbH, development of the corporate
website

Sep. 2004-Jan 2005 Self-employed as promoter for my-event Berlin, Germany

Apr. 2004-Sep 2004 Student apprentice at BORSIG Holding, Berlin, Germany
Development of ‘KennSys’, software to
manage environmental ratios

Nov. 2003-Apr. 2004 Student apprentice at BORSIG Hoding, Berlin, Germany
identification, analysis and presentation
of environmental ratios, conceptual
development of a software to manage
environmental ratios

2000-2003 Call center agent at FORSA Berlin, Berlin, Germany
Opinion Research Center


Education and Qualification

Oct. 2000 to Sep. 2004 Studies of Industrial Environmental Berlin, Germany
Computing at the University of
Applied Sciences FHTW-Berlin,
Industrial Environmental Computing“
Bachelor of Science, graduated ‘good’
Final mark: '2.2’

1993-2002 Georg Herwegh Gymnasium, Berlin, Germany
Grammar School




Extracurricular activities

Jan. 2005-Apr. 2005 Author of an academic article:
‘conceptual development of
software for the environmental
controlling to a medium sized
company’
presumably appear in print
in August 2005
‘Werkstattberichte aus der
Betrieblichen
Umweltinformatik’
Shaker verlag’

Additional skills

Languages German: fluently
Farsi: fluently
English: good knowledge
French: basic knowledge
Italian: basic knowledge

[Tdol]

at the AP-Luftfilter Brandenburg- I'd delete 'the'

my-event Berlin- capitals? This is the name, I presume

of a software - of a program/of software

Education and Qualification-Education and Qualifications
Industrial Environmental Computing“
Bachelor of Science, graduated ‘good’
Final mark: '2.2’ -delete the ". I'd say Bachelor of Science 2.2/2ii (I wouldn't include 'good' as well as the grade- it's not clear what it means)

‘conceptual development of
software for the environmental
controlling to a medium sized
company’- Title Case

presumably appear in print
in August 2005- To be pubished in August 2005...

Languages German: fluently
Languages
German: fluent

Thanks very much tdol.

Just one question: should I write "Title case" before or after the title?

Bye

[RonBee]

Originally Posted by babaco

Thanks very much tdol.

Just one question: should I write "Title case" before or after the title?

Bye

You don't do either. Instead, title case is a particular way that titles are presented. Thus, yours would be:

Conceptual Development of Software for the Environmental
Controlling to a Medium-sized Company

I would probably write that as:

Conceptual Development of Software for a Medium-sized Company

(I don't know what "environmental controlling" is supposed to mean.)