Could anybody please read my statement of purpose?

[icaro]

I am trying to apply for a physician assistant program in the US. Would anybody critique my statement of putpose?

I was born in xx to a xx father and an xx. I consider myself very lucky to have parents who believed in education and did not hesitate at any sacrifice to make it possible for me and my siblings to go to school in a time when my country was devastated by a long and painful war that left only destruction and took away lives and suppressed dreams.

After graduating from high school, I joined the Pharmacy School, in 19xx, at the University of xx in xx and earned a Pharm. D degree in 20xx. Later that year I moved to the United States, a country in which I’d always wanted to live.

In the United States I did not have much luck with the FPGEC, the committee that oversees the applications of foreign pharmacy graduates, which recognized my pharmacy degree but rejected my pharmacy license in xx, the country in which I earned my Pharmacy degree. At some point, I did consider the idea of starting from the beginning and going back to a Pharmacy school in the States, but I did not relish the idea of repeating so much work I’d already done, and spending money for a degree I have already earned. Therefore, in 2003, I decided to join the xx Department at the University of xx, to follow a master’s degree in immunology. It is an extremely positive experience that has taught me a lot about the immune system and its essential role in human health and disease. Currently, I am a senior laboratory technician in the same immunology laboratory, and planning to defend my master’s thesis by the fall of this year.

The thought of following a career in health care, and working with patients, not just pure research, has always inspired me. Thus, in addition to the courses required for my master’s, I have taken many additional classes for the sake of learning, and to be accademically prepared for a future college experience.
Three years ago, one of my friends asked me if I had ever considered a career as a physician’s assistant. It was something which I’d never heard about in xx. So I started doing my own research and, with time, I became convinced that is it the right path for me to follow. In 2006, I accepted a part time job at the the local hospitral, as an xx, to get the required patient experience. This gave me a wonderful opportunity to work with patients and to be part of a dedicated team of health professionals with a mission to deliver a quality health care service.

In January this year, another friend of mine was accepted into the PA program at xx Medical College. I talk to her, on a weekly basis, about the school and the classes she is taking. This helped me to make up my mind and contact the school, and here I am writing you a little history about myself, hoping to be among the candidates selected to join your program.

[RonBee]

I am trying to apply for a physician assistant program in the US. Would anybody critique my statement of putpose?

I was born in xx to a xx father and an xx. I consider myself very lucky to have parents who believed in education and did not hesitate to sacrifice to make it possible for me and my siblings to go to school in a time when my country was devastated by a long and painful war that left only destruction and took away lives and suppressed dreams.

After graduating from high school, I joined the Pharmacy School, in 19xx, at the University of xx in xx and earned a Pharm. D degree in 20xx. Later that year I moved to the United States, a country in which I’d always wanted to live.

In the United States I did not have much luck with the FPGEC, the committee that oversees the applications of foreign pharmacy graduates, which recognized my pharmacy degree but rejected my pharmacy license in xx, the country in which I earned my Pharmacy degree. At some point, I did consider the idea of starting from the beginning and going back to a Pharmacy school in the States, but I did not relish the idea of repeating so much work I’d already done, and spending money for a degree I had already earned. Therefore, in 2003, I decided to join the xx Department at the University of xx, to follow a master’s degree in immunology. It is an extremely positive experience that has taught me a lot about the immune system and its essential role in human health and disease. Currently, I am a senior laboratory technician in the same immunology laboratory, and planning to defend my master’s thesis by the fall of this year.

The thought of following a career in health care, and working with patients, not just pure research, has always inspired me. Thus, in addition to the courses required for my Master’s, I have taken many additional classes for the sake of learning, and to be accademically prepared for a future college experience.
Three years ago, one of my friends asked me if I had ever considered a career as a physician’s assistant. It was something which I’d never heard about in xx. So I started doing my own research and, with time, I became convinced that is it the right path for me to follow. In 2006, I accepted a part time job at the the local hospital, as an xx, to get the required patient experience. This gave me a wonderful opportunity to work with patients and to be part of a dedicated team of health professionals with a mission to deliver a quality health care service.

In January this year, another friend of mine was accepted into the PA program at xx Medical College. I talk to her on a weekly basis about the school and the classes she is taking. This helped me to make up my mind and contact the school, and here I am writing you a little history about myself, hoping to be among the candidates selected to join your program.

Excellent!