need advice for my recommendation letters~

[ezimi]

I have the Recommendation Letter already for admission to a Master program, but my professors are not so sure about their English expression.
Could someone help me with this? Thanks in advance~ o(∩_∩)o...



Dear Sir or Madam:

***, an outstanding student in my department, has requested a letter of recommendation to support her application for your Master’s degree programme. Being her former teacher and advisor for almost two years, I have the opportunity to contact with her closely and assess her justly.

I personally believe *** ranks among top 10% in terms of her excellent academic performance and charismatic personal character. She always quickly grasped the essence of the class and showed great eagerness for further academic research. She got the uncommon high scores (95/100 and 89/100) in the final exams of my courses, which required highly theoretical analyzing ability and critical thinking skills.

When *** asked me to be her adviser of an independent research, I was pleased to accept it. She overcame the shortage of lack enough familiarity with the facilities in her work very soon, acquired reliable date from complex background, did tedious laboratory experiment with patience and carefulness, and finally handled the research project successfully with her group. I praised her courage to do academic research, because there are few undergraduate students have interest in it and found her really good at cooperation. I thought her maturity in dealing with various relations comes from her early independent life which can adjust herself to a new environment easily.

Her grace in face of challenge became abundantly apparent to me during her second semester in sophomore. To extensive study in related fields she took much more elective courses than other students did, and participated in lots of extracurricular activities. Even when she was under enormous pressure, she was always able to maintain her high spirit, easy-going nature and optimism. As we all known, these characters, so-called perseverance, combine with her team spirit are quite important in research.

As an extraordinary senior student in our department, *** has been accepted as a graduate without normal mandatory admission exams. However, she told me about her plan to study further in the Netherlands at your prestigious university. Although I felt some regret on her decision to leave at first, I am convinced she will contribute greatly to your programme.

All in all, I support ***’s application for admission without any hesitation and reservation. Your kind consideration will be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely yours,





Here is the other one:




Dear Sir or Madam:

It gives me great satisfaction to recommend ***, for admission in your esteemed master’s programme. As her professor in several undergraduate courses, I believe I am one of the best persons who can vouch for her application.

Academically, *** has been a conscientious student. I have known her since she was a freshman when she took my course, Geomorphology. She does her best in every assignment and research, and is always longing to consult with me and refer to sources other than what I provide in class. Since then, as Director of Geography Department, I had noted her academic potential and unwavering diligence in her studies. She thinks critically, practices well and has all the qualities of a good researcher. Her grades have been consistently at the top level in almost all of her courses, leading her honored with academic scholarships for two consecutive years. That is not easy in Northeast Normal University as it has lots of top students of China.

As a versatile young lady, *** has actively participated in a diverse assortment of extracurricular activities, ranging from chorus to environmental organization. She has also spent considerable time in volunteer work. She organized a charity team to gather donation for orphans, and volunteered more than 12 hours each week at rural schools as a teacher. *** told me that she felt extremely delighted when helping others.

Unlike many students who are not sure which field to pursue, *** has made clear to us all that her goal is to do Urban Study. To this end she has now worked tirelessly in a research on urban-rural cohesion as part of her undergraduate thesis.

I strongly approve ***’s well-thought plan to further her study in your renowned graduate programme. I recommend her with all my heart and wish her the very best in all future endeavors.

Sincerely yours,

[Anglika]

Dear Sir or Madam:

***, an outstanding student in my department, has requested a letter of recommendation to support her application for your Master’s degree programme. Being her former teacher and advisor for almost two years, I had the opportunity to work with her closely and assess her justly.

I personally believe *** ranks among the top 10% in terms of her excellent academic performance and charismatic personal character. She always quickly grasped the essence of the class and showed great eagerness for further academic research. She acheived exceptional high scores (95/100 and 89/100) in the final exams of my courses, which required highly theoretical analyzing ability and critical thinking skills.

When *** asked me to be her adviser for her independent research, I was pleased to agree. She overcame the shortage of enough familiarity with the facilities in her work very soon, acquired reliable date from complex backgrounds, did tedious laboratory experiments with patience and carefulness, and finally handled the research project successfully with her group. I praised her courage in doing academic research because there are few undergraduate students have a true interest in it, and found her really good at cooperation. I believe her maturity in dealing with various relationships comes from her early independent life which means she can adjust herself to a new environment easily.

Her grace in face of challenge became abundantly apparent to me during her second semester. To extend her study into related fields, she took many more elective courses than other students did, and participated in lots of extracurricular activities. Even when she was under enormous pressure, she was always able to maintain her high spirits, easy-going nature and optimism. As we all known, these characteristics and perseverance, combined with her team spirit, are quite important in research.

As an extraordinary senior student in our department, *** has been accepted as a graduate without normal mandatory admission exams. However, she told me about her plan to study further in the Netherlands at your prestigious university. Although I felt some regret on her decision to leave at first, I am convinced she will contribute greatly to your programme.

All in all, I support ***’s application for admission without any hesitation and reservation. Your kind consideration will be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely yours,

[Anglika]

Dear Sir or Madam:

It gives me great satisfaction to recommend ***, for admission in your esteemed Master’s programme. As her professor for several undergraduate courses, I believe I am one of the best persons who can vouch for her application.

Academically, *** has been a conscientious student. I have known her since she was a freshman when she took my course on Geomorphology. She does her best in every assignment and research, and is always prepared to consult with me and refer to sources other than what I provide in class. Since then, as Director of Geography Department, I have noted her academic potential and unwavering diligence in her studies. She thinks critically, practices well and has all the qualities of a good researcher. Her grades have been consistently at the top level in almost all of her courses, leading to academic scholarships for two consecutive years. That is not easy in Northeast Normal University as it has very many of the top students of China.

As a versatile young lady, *** has actively participated in a diverse assortment of extracurricular activities, ranging from choral singing to environmental organizations. She has also spent considerable time in volunteer work. She organized a charity team to gather donations for orphans, and volunteered more than 12 hours each week at rural schools as a teacher. *** told me that she felt extremely delighted when helping others.

Unlike many students who are not sure which field to pursue, *** has made clear to us all that her goal is to do Urban Studies. To this end she has now worked tirelessly in on a research project about urban-rural cohesion as part of her undergraduate thesis.

I strongly approve ***’s well thought-out plan to further her study in your renowned graduate programme. I recommend her with all my heart and wish her the very best in all future endeavors.

Sincerely yours,

[ezimi]

Dear Anglika,

Thank you so much for your correction.

If possible, could you give me some comments and suggestions on these letters, as if you were an adimission officer?