Please revice or give advice to my Letter of Motivation

[skyline001]

I am applying an internship at a company and please tell me how you think, thank you very much

Letter of Motivation

Human Resources Development Department
XXXX Corporation

February, 6th 2009

Dear Sir or Madam

I am currently a second-year graduate student majoring in International Relations at XXXX University. I would like to apply for 6-month in length internship opportunity at XXXX Corporation, preferably in Marketing or Sales position.

My impression towards XXXX began in my childhood, when my parents purchased the first compact dishwasher in our home. The dishwasher was efficient, quiet and durable – it still works well even today. It is fair to mention that product quality defines the spirit of brand image, and quality depends on the reliability of management team. Be able to work with and learn from the industry leader will be considered to be a remarkable opportunity.

In my opinion, Marketing and Sales are the two most interesting departments, where I can utilize people skill and language ability. I became interested in strategic promotion of products or events during my undergraduate in Canada. I was a member of XXXX, a non profit import-car club formed by tuning enthusiasts. Since the formation of XXXX, we held early auto shows, which were amongst the most popular of the kind in interior British Columbia. My position was in support of contacting sponsors, participating members, and promotion of the auto show. As a main piece of information we campaign on our show is not to illegal street race, and our profit were donated to charity groups such as Kamloops Food Bank and Mother Against Drunk Driving (MADD).

I have enclosed my résumé for your review. Thank you for the time and considering me for the internship opportunity. I look forward to hearing from you soon, and am available for an interview at whatever time is suitable for you. I can be contacted at XXXXgmail.com or on my cellular phone 555-9697-1234.

Yours sincerely


Skyline001

[Anglika]

Originally Posted by skyline001

I am applying an internship at a company and please tell me how you think, thank you very much

Letter of Motivation

Human Resources Development Department
XXXX Corporation

February, 6th 2009

Dear Sir or Madam

I am currently a second-year graduate student majoring in International Relations at XXXX University. I would like to apply for 6-month in length internship opportunity at XXXX Corporation, preferably in a Marketing or Sales position.

My[STRIKE] impression towards[/STRIKE] inclination for XXXX began in my childhood, when my parents purchased the first compact dishwasher for our home. The dishwasher was efficient, quiet and durable – it still works well even today. It is fair to mention that product quality defines the spirit of brand image, and quality depends on the reliability of management team. To be able to work with and learn from the industry leader will be considered to be a remarkable opportunity.

In my opinion, Marketing and Sales are the two most interesting departments, where I can make use of my people skills and language ability. I became interested in strategic promotion of products or events during my undergraduate time in Canada. I was a member of XXXX, a non profit import-car club formed by tuning enthusiasts. Since the formation of XXXX, wWe held early auto shows, which were amongst the most popular of the kind in interior British Columbia. My position was in support of contacting sponsors, participating members, and promotion of the auto show. As a main piece of information we campaign on our show against illegal street races, and our profits were donated to charity groups such as Kamloops Food Bank and Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD).

I have enclosed my résumé for your review. Thank you for taking the time to consider me for the internship opportunity. I look forward to hearing from you soon, and am available for an interview at whatever time is suitable for you. I can be contacted at XXXXgmail.com or on my cellular phone 555-9697-1234.

Yours sincerely


Skyline001

First : revise/advise = verbs
revision/advice = nouns