Re: how to express finding something is rarely got a hope?
I think that the lack of any replies to you so far is a good indication that there aren't any commonly used expressions for this situation, other that the "needle in the haystack" example you quoted. I certainly can't think of one....
Incidentally, you asked "Native Americans" for help. I understand that that term refers to the original inhabitants of the Americas [who used to be called "Red Indians"], as opposed to those who settled there later. Unless you are looking for words and phrases used exclusively in so-called "American English", it's best to seek help from "Native English Speakers" - such as the British!
I'm not a teacher of English, but I have spoken it for (almost) all of my life....