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  1. #1
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    Question Translated poem, thoughts?



    Hello,

    I have translated a poetic piece, a bit metaphorical and difficult from Arabic language to English language.
    I would love to hear any thoughts about it and whether it makes any sense...

    Is that allowed here or not? May I hear any feedback if I post it?

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Translated poem, thoughts?

    Only one way to find out..................

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Translated poem, thoughts?

    what do you mean?

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Translated poem, thoughts?

    Let everyone see it and you'll soon find out if anyone has any views on it.
    I, for one, would be interested.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Translated poem, thoughts?

    OK. This is the piece, as I said in the title, your thoughts would enrich me for sure...


    "The One Hidden Into My Features."


    Tonight,

    nostalgia overwhelmed,

    thereby went out , forgetting my features,

    over

    the pillow,

    tracking imprints of beloved

    once

    adorned my city

    ***

    I watch for you

    my wait is aging

    and the female inside of me

    fabricates smiles

    for bitterness to come

    ***

    As usual

    burrowing through the dreams of yesterday

    looking for your face

    as it found to be hidden,

    into my features.

    ****

    Blanketed in Silence

    for fear

    of stumbling

    over the question

    why such dancing sadness

    is in the eyes?

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Translated poem, thoughts?


    "The One Hidden In My Features."

    Tonight,

    nostalgia overwhelmed me.

    I therefore went out, forsaking my features

    upon

    the pillow,

    tracking imprints of my beloved who

    once

    adorned my city.

    ***

    I watch for you

    my wait is tiring

    and the female inside of me

    fabricates smiles

    for the bitterness to come.

    ***

    As usual,

    burrowing through the dreams of yesterday,

    looking for your face

    as though it were to be found hidden

    in my features,

    ****

    Blanketed in silence

    for fear

    of stumbling

    over the question:

    Why is such dancing sadness

    in the eyes?

  7. #7
    easybreakable's Avatar
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    Default Re: Translated poem, thoughts?

    What a great help!
    Seemingly you grasped the meaning of the poem very well, thank you, I appreciate your help very very much

  8. #8
    buggles's Avatar
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    Default Re: Translated poem, thoughts?

    Now you know what I meant in post#2.

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