I have to apologize my belated submission of the application ...

evertonkong

New member
Joined
Feb 3, 2024
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
Please help me improve the following email. Thank you.

Dear Madam,

I have to apologize my belated submission of the application for hostel allowance, whose deadline should fall on 30 Jan 2024 and no late application will be entertained.

However, since I have been extremel busy in managing my office works and dealing with my severe mental problem, I am yet to submit my application on time. Honestly, I once suffered from severe carcinoma of lung several years ago and I am coming down with serious Mentally Disorder, I wish you will kindly accept my late application for the allowance, particularly considering that my days badly affected by the illness, my lifetime is truly numbered as a consequence, and that I have to pay for quite considerable medical fees to survive every month.

Last, my application and supporting documents are already ready to reach your office. I really hope you will proceed my application on ground of compassion. Certainly, I am always delighted to talk to you about my case in depth at your convenience. Thank you.
 

teechar

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Feb 18, 2015
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
Iraq
Current Location
Iraq
Hello, and welcome to the forum. :)
Dear Madam,
Are you certain that the person reading your email is female? If so, do you know her surname and title?
late application will be entertained.
If that is the case, don't you think you're wasting your time?
busy in managing my office works
What does that mean?
coming down with serious Mentally Disorder,
That is vague. Can you provide a bit more information?
my application and supporting documents are already ready to reach your office.
What does that mean?
 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
I don't know about China but in the UK, if you're asking for something to be considered outside of the rules because you have a physical/mental issue, you would need to back that up with a certificate or confirmation letter from a doctor.
 

Tarheel

VIP Member
Joined
Jun 16, 2014
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
American English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
United States
If the deadline has, in fact, passed, then I would say that, not "was supposed to be". You could also say you missed the deadline or the deadline has come and gone. That, in fact, was the deadline, but you missed it.
 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
@evertonkong I think you need to make it shorter and to the point.

Dear [Ms/Miss/Mrs + surname, or however you would write the full name in Chinese]

I am writing to ask you to consider a late application for hostel allowance, on compassionate grounds.

I'm aware that the deadline for applications was 30 January 2024, but unfortunately I was unable to apply by the deadline due to some serious medical issues (supporting documentation from my medical team is attached).

I look forward to a positive reply from you. Please feel free to contact me if you need any more information.

Yours sincerely

[Your name]

Attachments: [List of attached documents]
 

evertonkong

New member
Joined
Feb 3, 2024
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
Thank you for your advices.

On the other hand, I want to ask how I can improve the following sentence:

I have been taking the deadline for the hostel allowance application being on 15 Feb 2024 for 30 Jan 2024 when reading the attached application form in the email dated 20 Dec 2023.

Thanks again.
 

Tarheel

VIP Member
Joined
Jun 16, 2014
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
American English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
United States
@evertonkong The word "advice" is a noncount noun.

You can't improve that sentence. Discard it.

What do you think "On the other hand" means?

(I have never figured out the purpose of thanking people ahead of time for things they might not ever do.)
 
Top