Report on improvement works

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chowbarry

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Please help me improve the following report on improvement works. Thank you.

1) As discussed, a meeting between Mr. Johnson and our colleagues have been held at Eminent Road lately for the discussion about several improvement works within the region. During the meeting, Mr. Johnson citied the local residents' concern about the narrowness of the footpath at Eminent Road, which highly prompted inconvenience to them when ingressing and egressing there. Mr. Johnson therefore proposed the departments concerned to consider reducing part of the adjacent planting area with the aim to widening the footpath and providing a more convenient area for the pedestrians there. In view of your department and the Construction Department being responsible for the road improvement issue, we hope you all can study the feasibility of Mr. Johnson's proposal. On the other hand, as the maintenance agent of the planting area, we have at this stage no objection to the reduction of portion of planting area aiming to accommodating the enlargement of the footpath and you may wish to directly update Mr. Johnson and us the result of your study on the proposed work by the end of this month. If you are not the right recipient for handling the above issue, please refer the issue to the relevant parties to take necessary follow-up action.

2) We refer to a recent telephone discussion with Mr. Parker about a beautification work. Learning from Mr. Parker, with the inhabitants of Phoenix Court growing faster than expected in recent years, there has been a strong demand from the uprising inhabitants for the leisure areas such as children play areas and the physical fitness area at the nearby Sunshine Park under our management. As added by Mr. Parker, both the current children play equipment and physical fitness equipment are mostly aging, outdated and far from meeting the satisfaction of the inhabitants. In this connection, Mr. Parker, with the allegation of obtaining support of the majority of Phoenix Court's inhabitants, requested the construction section like you and us to promptly carry out a joint research about the expansion of current children play area with the addition of some modern and popular equipment for the children, together with the installation of several new physical fitness equipment at the fitness hub. To address the requests from Mr. Parker and the inhabitants, we hope you will conduct a study on his suggestion and take part in a joint site meeting next Friday morning proposed by him for in-depth discussion about the matter. Similarly, referring to the letter dated 15.07.2016 to your goodself and the discussion with Mr. Parker, he reiterated his strong wish to demolish all the drainage channels at Bridge Road rather than just modifying those channels by installing the drainage covers as he stated those channels had been abandoned for years and identified as a main source of prompting the breeding of mosquitos in recent months.
 

emsr2d2

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Please help me improve the following report on improvement works. Thank you.

1) As discussed, a meeting between Mr. Johnson and our colleagues [STRIKE]have been[/STRIKE] was held recently at Eminent Road, [STRIKE]lately[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]for the discussion about[/STRIKE] in order to discuss several improvement works within the region.

During the meeting, Mr. Johnson [STRIKE]citied[/STRIKE] cited [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] local residents' concerns about the narrowness of the footpath at Eminent Road, which [STRIKE]highly prompted[/STRIKE] would cause serious inconvenience to them when [STRIKE]ingressing[/STRIKE] entering and [STRIKE]egressing[/STRIKE] leaving. [STRIKE]there.[/STRIKE]

Mr. Johnson therefore proposed that the departments concerned [STRIKE]to[/STRIKE] consider reducing part of the adjacent planting area with the aim [STRIKE]to[/STRIKE] of widening the footpath and providing a more convenient area for the pedestrians. [STRIKE]there.[/STRIKE]

In view of the fact that your department and the Construction Department [STRIKE]being[/STRIKE] are responsible for the road improvement issue, we hope you [STRIKE]all[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]can[/STRIKE] will study the feasibility of Mr. Johnson's proposal.

[STRIKE]On the other hand,[/STRIKE] As the maintenance agent of the planting area, we have at this stage no objection to the reduction of portion of planting area [STRIKE]aiming[/STRIKE] to accommodate[STRIKE]ing[/STRIKE] the enlargement of the footpath.

[STRIKE]and[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]You may wish to[/STRIKE] Please directly update Mr. Johnson and us with the result of your study on the proposed work by the end of this month.

If you are not the right [STRIKE]recipient[/STRIKE] person [STRIKE]for handling[/STRIKE] to handle the above issue, please [STRIKE]refer[/STRIKE] forward [STRIKE]the issue[/STRIKE] this email/message to the relevant parties to take the necessary follow-up action.

Please see my suggested corrections to paragraph 1 above. I have separated the sentences with line breaks simply for ease of reading.
 

tedmc

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2) We refer to a recent telephone discussion with Mr. Parker(designation?) about a beautification [STRIKE]work[/STRIKE] project. [STRIKE]Learning from [/STRIKE] We have come to know from Mr. Parker and with the population[STRIKE] inhabitants [/STRIKE]of Phoenix Court growing faster than expected in recent years, there has been a strong and rising demand from the [STRIKE]uprising [/STRIKE] inhabitants for [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]leisure areas[/STRIKE] recreational facilities such as children play areas and [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] physical fitness area at the nearby Sunshine Park under our management.[STRIKE] As added by[/STRIKE] According to Mr. Parker, both the current children playground equipment and physical fitness equipment are mostly [STRIKE]aging[/STRIKE] old/aged, outdated and far from meeting the [STRIKE]satisfaction[/STRIKE] expectations of the inhabitants.

In this connection, Mr. Parker, with the [STRIKE]allegation of obtaining[/STRIKE] support of the majority of Phoenix Court's inhabitants, requested the [STRIKE]construction[/STRIKE]
Project Management section,[STRIKE] like[/STRIKE] that is you and us, to promptly carry out a joint research [STRIKE]about [/STRIKE] on the expansion of the current children play area with the addition of some modern and popular equipment for the children, together with the installation of several new physical fitness equipment at the fitness [STRIKE]hub[/STRIKE] centre. To address the requests from Mr. Parker and the inhabitants, we hope you will conduct a study on his suggestions and [STRIKE]take part in[/STRIKE] attend a joint site meeting next Friday morning proposed by him, for an in-depth discussion about the matter.

[STRIKE]Similarly[/STRIKE]
On another note, [STRIKE]referring to[/STRIKE] in the letter dated 15.07.2016 to your goodself and the discussion with Mr. Parker, he reiterated his strong wish to demolish all the drainage channels at Bridge Road rather than just modifying those channels by installing the drainage covers as he stated those channels had been abandoned for years and identified as [STRIKE]a main source of prompting[/STRIKE] the main breeding ground of mosquitoes in recent months.
 
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