According to your discussion with YY last Friday

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Joj

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According to your discussion with YY last Friday, we reduced the storage to 20 kwh, which can be expanded to 30 kwh in the future. The additional cost for the 10kwh will be $3,000.
Please keep in mind that the structure is not included in the deal because we considered it that you will provide it since you produce steel.
And, in answer to the last question, absolutely, all lighting and accessories are included in the package.
 
Haven't we told you before that you keep inappropriately using "According to"? You've done it again here. Open with something else.
 
Following your phone conversation last Friday with Mrs. YY, I have attached the revised offer.
We have reduced the storage to 20 kwh, which can be expanded to 30 kwh in the future. The additional cost for the 10kwh will be $3,000.
Please keep in mind that the structure is not included in the deal because we considered it that you will provide it since you produce steel.
And, in answer to the last question, absolutely, all lighting and accessories are included in the package.
 
Following from your phone conversation last Friday with Mrs. YY, I have attached here the revised offer.
We have reduced the storage to 20 kwh, which can be expanded to 30 kwh in the future. The additional cost for the 10kwh will be $3,000.
Please keep in mind that the structure is not included in the deal offer because we considered it that you will provide it take it that you will do it since you produce steel.
And, in answer to the last question, absolutely, all lighting and accessories are included in the package.
 
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Perhaps:

Regarding your phone conversation with Mrs. YY .....

I think of an offer as something somebody is willing to pay for something. However, that's not the way you use it. (Maybe yours is a legitimate use of the word.)
 
Start with "Following on from ..." or "As discussed with YY last Friday".
 
Perhaps:

Regarding your phone conversation with Mrs. YY .....

I think of an offer as something somebody is willing to pay for something. However, that's not the way you use it. (Maybe yours is a legitimate use of the word.)
The offer is to supply an equipment for a price, but I would call it a quotation, to be precise.
 
The offer is to supply an equipment for a price, but I would call it a quotation, to be precise.
That's it! I think that's what I was trying to think of.
 
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