[Essay] Please evaluate and point out mistakes: The age of information technology has taken a

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fahad_a11

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Please evaluate and point out mistakes.

The age of information technology has taken a lot of people by surprise. While it has become a way of life for some, others know very little about it and may be unlikely to learn.
Eventually we will have a polarized society and this will lead to serious social problems.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?

The use of information technology has significantly increased in developed countries over the last few years. It has dramatically improved people lives with its undeniable benefits. Some people have welcomed information technology wholeheartedly and they are applying this in their daily work routine to improve quality and reliability. However, others seem to be reluctant while adapting this and they are confined with old traditions ways of doing things. I believe that information technology can greatly improve people lives and gradually all people start using it because of its numerous advantages.

There is no doubt that information technology has changed the way people used to work and live earlier. Nowadays, all the offices, universities and schools are equipped with computers, internet and tablets to avail the maximum benefits of this technology. Furthermore, people are more interactive now by using internet as a source of medium for communication that is more reliable and cheaper in all ways.

However, some people still like conventional ways of work and do not like to change themselves according to the need of time. They like to go libraries instead of using internet that has large database of information. They prefer to write letter despite of it slow nature of communication.

To sum up, I would like to say that the use of information technology is more prevalent in modern societies because of its numerous positive effects. Only a few numbers of people are unwilling to change themselves but I am sure there will be dramatic shift soon in their opinion, as they start getting more and more benefits out of it.
 
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teechar

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Eventually we will have a polarized society and this will lead to serious social problems.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?


Your essay is somewhat off topic, especially your second body paragraph. You need to refute the counterargument you presented there. You kind of did that in the conclusion, which you shouldn't!
 

fahad_a11

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Please suggest some points for 2nd body paragraph?
 

teechar

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It's much better if you come up with the ideas yourself. ;-)
We can certainly offer our comments and suggestions then.
Think of ways to refute what you said in that paragraph. You need to come up with arguments against the counter-arguments there!
 

fahad_a11

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Please check the following points are correct.

- Less social, as electronic services provide cheap means of communication
- Unable to get benefits from latest technologies
- Variation in people skills; people who adapted to new technology are greater chances of having good jobs etc.
 

teechar

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Yes, you could use them to refute the counter-arguments; i.e. you can use these three points to argue that eventually most people will embrace new technology.
 

fahad_a11

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Right. I got it. Thank you!
 
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