Describe this gorgeous tree

Status
Not open for further replies.

alpacinou

Key Member
Joined
Sep 30, 2019
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
Persian
Home Country
Iran
Current Location
Iran
Hello everyone

How would you describe this picture?

I came up with this myself but as usual, I would be much obliged if you would offer me your own ideas.

A mighty tree rears up in all its glory and lushness from the soil...with a web of infinite intertwined branches festooned with moss. A bush of pink flowers taking a rest in its dense giant shadow.

Monty Don's American Gardens 2020 E02[(056683)18-13-06].jpg
Does my sentence work at all? Is it grammatical? What about the style?

*I have to inform you that I asked this question in another forum but did not get results there.
 
You can describe one feature as bearded with Spanish moss.
 
You can describe one feature as bearded with Spanish moss.

Thanks for your suggestion.

Do you think this works at all?

A mighty tree rears up in all its glory and lushness from the soil...with a web of infinite intertwined branches festooned with moss. A bush of pink flowers is taking a rest in its dense giant shadow.
 
Catch and kill an adjective or three.

That stuff hanging from the branches is Spanish moss. "Moss" without a modifier is green.

Is there something other than soil from which a tree could rear up?

I'm pretty sure there's a finite number of branches. I'm also getting the idea that flowery language works better in contemporary Persian than it does in modern English. :)
 
I would say the tree stands there, not that it rears up.
 
I feel like I'm part of a committee taking all the joy out of this. Sorry. :-(
 
It seems to be an environment all its own. Animals that like shade would love it.
:)
 
What about the style?

flowery language works better in contemporary Persian than it does in modern English.

I think a lot of us agree with GoesStation's comment here. This style of using overly flowery language sounds really naff in English. The problem for you, alpacinoutd, is twofold: first, you can't detect this, and second, for whatever reason, that's exactly how you want to sound. I agree with GoesStation that this is likely to do with the fact that this kind of style sounds good in Persian, but also to do with the fact that your English is not yet sensitive enough for the subtlety of good poetic language.

Mind you, if your aim is simply to practise using new vocabulary, then I fully encourage you to continue. It takes a lot of practice and feedback to master the vocabulary of English, and a long time to develop an ear for style.
 
When I looked at the photo, and it is stunning, it was the dangling down that caught my eye more than rearing up.
 
When I looked at the photo, and it is stunning, it was the dangling down that caught my eye more than rearing up.

Could "cascade" be used in this context?
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top