Can you help me correct these sentences? Thank you!

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heyuting

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It depends on which decisions their kids made. For example, if their kids want to study abroad, of course, they have to consult with their parents. And their parents will give them advisable suggestions. What’s more, studying abroad needs a large amount of money, their parents should be part in their kids’ decision-making process. On the other hand, if their kids want to find a good place to relax. There is no need to confer with their parents.
 
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Heyuting - I have a question for you. You have posted a lot of these short pieces for correction. May I ask what they are for? Are they pieces which you have handed in to a tutor and have been told contain errors but you have not been told what the errors are? Are they "homework"-related at all?
 
It's not for my homework. I am trying to improve my writing skill, because I couldn't find the errors I made, even though it seemed right for me.
I am sorry. Did I bother you guys?
emsr2d2 said:
Heyuting - I have a question for you. You have posted a lot of these short pieces for correction. May I ask what they are for? Are they pieces which you have handed in to a tutor and have been told contain errors but you have not been told what the errors are? Are they "homework"-related at all?
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heyuting said:
It depends on which decisions their kids made. For example, if their kids want to study abroad, of course, they have to consult with their parents. And their parents will give them advisable suggestions. What’s more, studying abroad needs a large amount of money, their parents should be part in their kids’ decision-making process. On the other hand, if their kids want to know find a good place to relax. There is no need to confer with their parents.
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Your writting is very good indeed.
( Do you need " know" in the sentence "if their kids want to know find a good place to relax"):)
 
khiemvv said:
Your writ[STRIKE]t[/STRIKE]ing is very good indeed.
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Welcome to the forum, khiemvv.

Please note this forum guideline:

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You are welcome to answer questions posted in the Ask a Teacher forum as long as your suggestions, help, and advice reflect a good understanding of the English language. If you are not a teacher, you will need to state that clearly at the top of your post. Please note, all posts are moderated by our in-house language experts, so make sure your suggestions, help, and advice house the kind of information an international language teacher would offer. If not, and your posts do not contribute to the topic in a positive way, they will be subject to deletion.
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heyuting said:
It's not for my homework. I am trying to improve my writing skill, because I couldn't find the errors I made, even though it seemed right for me.
I am sorry. Did I bother you guys?
Click to expand...

No, please don't apologise. You aren't bothering us! I only asked because there didn't seem to be a connection between the short paragraphs that you were posting here. Initially, I thought perhaps you were writing a short story or a short book and you wanted us to help you correct in small parts, but then I realised that the posts didn't connect. So do you simply pick a random topic and start writing about it? I'm just curious.

Here are my suggestions for your piece:

It depends on which decisions their kids make (I would use the present tense here as the rest of the piece is in the present tense). For example, if their kids want to study abroad, of course[STRIKE],[/STRIKE] (no comma) they have to consult with their parents and their parents will give them [STRIKE]advisable suggestions[/STRIKE] useful advice. What’s more, studying abroad [STRIKE]needs a large amount of money[/STRIKE] is expensive and [STRIKE]their[/STRIKE] parents should be part [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE] of their kids’ decision-making process. On the other hand, if their kids want to find a good place to relax, there is no need to confer with their parents.​


​
 
Thank you for all the people who helped me! I appreciate it.
 
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