minnie29
Member
- Joined
- Apr 23, 2011
- Member Type
- Student or Learner
- Native Language
- Chinese
- Home Country
- Taiwan
- Current Location
- Taiwan
hello! i am a ESL so when i have to write a essay i have lots question
this time, my essay topic is formal letter of complaint
and here is my first draft
i post here to for teachers suggestion about arrangement, WC and so on.
i do not ask everyone finsih it for me
i just need suggestion
( and i am new on here if there is any offense, really sorry for it)
Dear to whom it may concern:
One month ago, I had ordered two skirts of same style but in black and white two colors and then I waited for a month of the working time. When I got these two skirts that I found the white one has serious flaw in hollow lace pattern and the black one was the wrong product. So I called the customer service to ask for returning the products. The servicer gave me a direct answer that the Black Cats delivering person would withdraw the products from my dorm and she also check my schedule to be able to meet the delivering person. But the delivering person didn’t come at the appointment time; I sent the products back by myself via post office. After two weeks later I got the replacements, to my angry, the white one had obvious yellow grimes and the black on still was a wrong product. What’s worse, the third time of exchanging products that I waited for three weeks that’s mean from order to getting the right product I over two months. During the waiting time, none servicer connected me but I did. This was really inefficient process and unpleasant service that I wouldn’t like to have shopping on your online shop again unless you have better improvement. I hope you can have much better staff training and efficient process. I like your products but its pity to have unlike service. I am looking forward to hearing from you and improvement.
this time, my essay topic is formal letter of complaint
and here is my first draft
i post here to for teachers suggestion about arrangement, WC and so on.
i do not ask everyone finsih it for me
i just need suggestion
( and i am new on here if there is any offense, really sorry for it)
Dear to whom it may concern:
One month ago, I had ordered two skirts of same style but in black and white two colors and then I waited for a month of the working time. When I got these two skirts that I found the white one has serious flaw in hollow lace pattern and the black one was the wrong product. So I called the customer service to ask for returning the products. The servicer gave me a direct answer that the Black Cats delivering person would withdraw the products from my dorm and she also check my schedule to be able to meet the delivering person. But the delivering person didn’t come at the appointment time; I sent the products back by myself via post office. After two weeks later I got the replacements, to my angry, the white one had obvious yellow grimes and the black on still was a wrong product. What’s worse, the third time of exchanging products that I waited for three weeks that’s mean from order to getting the right product I over two months. During the waiting time, none servicer connected me but I did. This was really inefficient process and unpleasant service that I wouldn’t like to have shopping on your online shop again unless you have better improvement. I hope you can have much better staff training and efficient process. I like your products but its pity to have unlike service. I am looking forward to hearing from you and improvement.
Sincerely,
