[Essay] Please help me correct my writing about my laptop.

[kurin150]

My laptop

My most useful possession is my laptop. My family gave it to me to study and learn English.
It's a model Vostro Dell 3558. It's now maybe 2 or 2,5 years and the battery was dead recently. But it's good at all types of working such as office , matlab and autocad. It's also still good to play video games. I usally use it 6 to 8 hours a day. I'm finding a computer shop to buy a battery of my laptop. Personally, it can last longer than 1 or 2 years and if it's broken, I'll keep it such a nice memory of studying in Da Nang University.


Thank you for reading. I hope you have a nice day.

 

[emsr2d2]

Welcome to the forum. :hi:

What are you going to do with your piece of writing when it's ready?

 

[kurin150]

Welcome to the forum. :hi:

What are you going to do with your piece of writing when it's ready?

I'm studying writing skills and this piece of writing is a topic in Speakout Starter Book for students to improve the writing skills. But there isn't any script about Writing section so I don't know whether I'm wrong about my grammars or my vocabularies.

 

[emsr2d2]

OK. Well, the first thing you should do is add a space after every full stop and comma. You can click on Edit Post in post #1 and make those changes. Once that's done, I'll remove this post and we'll move on to looking at the content.