...but the trouble was that I'd never seen you before

[shootingstar]

. . .
Dr. Gibbs: I was remembering my wedding morning, Julia.
Mrs. Gibbs: Now don't start that Frank Gibbs.
Dr. Gibbs: I was the scaredest young fella in the State of New Hampshire. I thought I'd make a mistake for sure. And when I saw you comin' down that aisle I thought you were the prettiest girl I'd ever seen, but the only trouble was that I'd never seen you before. There I was in the Congregational Church marryin' a total stranger.
. . .
(Thornton Wilder, Our Town, Act II)

My trouble is that I doubt the underlined sentences. I'm wondering if something like that could have happened in the US respectively New Hampshire even if that took place in the late 19th century. That doesn't even look like the American way of life. Maybe this was due to certain customs and traditions of the Congregational Church at the close of the 19th century I'm not familiar with.

 

[Barque]

My trouble is that I doubt the underlined sentences.

What exactly do you mean when you say you "doubt" them?

That doesn't even look like the American way of life.

Are you referring to the fact that he married a woman he'd never met before? It's quite possible such marriages took place at that time. The modern practice of marrying people you know and have been in a relationship with is just that--modern. Marriages arranged by one's parents did often take place in the US too.

I haven't understood what puzzles you about the words "State of New Hampshire".

 

[shootingstar]

As for the US and hence New Hampshire I just consider it impossible that someone marries someone else not having seen each other before even if that had happened at the close of the 19th century. It's just not American-like. I suspect that it has to do with the customs and traditions of the Congregational Church in those days.

 

[Barque]

It's just not American-like.

It doesn't surprise me at all that there may have been family-arranged marriages in America in the 19th century, or even in the 20th. I see an American has expressed agreement with my last post, and maybe he or another American will contribute more.

 

[5jj]

As for the US and hence New Hampshire I just consider it impossible that someone marries someone else not having seen each other before even if that had happened at the close of the 19th century. It's just not American-like.

European American men sought financial success in the migration West, but few women lived there at this time, so it was hard for these men to settle down and start a family. During the California gold rush in 1849, there were at least three men for every woman, and by 1852 the ratio had increased to nearly seven men for every woman.[10]: 65  They attempted to attract women living back East; the men wrote letters to churches and published personal advertisements in magazines and newspapers. In return, the women would write to the men and send them photographs of themselves. Courtship was conducted by letter, until a woman agreed to marry a man she had never met.[23] Many women wanted to escape their present way of living, gain financial security and see what life on the frontier could offer them. Most of these women were single, but some were widows, divorcées or runaways.[24] Mail-order marriages gave Black women an escape from the crushing racial restrictions in the South.[10]: 141  In 1885, a group of married Black women in Arizona Territory formed the Busy Bee Club to advertise for wives for Arizona miners, hoping to reduce violence in the mining camps and encourage Black women to move to the area.[25]: 144 [26]: 31–34 

To recruit mail-order brides for Oregon, area bachelors combined funds to send two brothers east. The Benton brothers began their search in Maryland, posting "Brides Wanted" flyers. They held meetings at which they described the territory and promised free passage west. More than 100 women accompanied the Bentons back to Oregon.[10]: 83–84  Asa Mercer performed a similar recruiting role for Seattle. Only 11 women accompanied Mercer back on his first trip, but his second was more successful, with more than 100 women travelling to Seattle, accompanied by a New York Times journalist to chronicle the journey. These prospective brides were known as Mercer Girls.[10]: 89–91 

British Columbia welcomed sixty women from Britain, mail-order brides recruited by the Columbia Emigration Society, in 1862. Another twenty women from Australia were bound for Victoria but were convinced to stay in San Francisco when their ship docked there.[27]

Mail-order bride - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[shootingstar]

European American men sought financial success in the migration West, but few women lived there at this time, so it was hard for these men to settle down and start a family. . .

OK, very interesting indeed - thank you. The only objection, which could be made, is that this account refers to the West of the United States. However, New Hampshire is a New England state at the East Coast. But,. maybe, those circumstances influenced the Northeastern States as well.

 

[emsr2d2]

OK, very interesting indeed - thank you. The only objection no comma here which that could be made no comma here is that this account refers to the west of the United States no full stop here However, but New Hampshire is a New England state at on the East Coast. But,. However, maybe no comma here those circumstances influenced the Northeastern states as well.

Note my corrections above. I think it's entirely possible that the same situation happened in many parts of the country.

 

[shootingstar]

I think it's entirely possible that the same situation happened in many parts of the country.

Thank you very much. Nevertheless, I guess there are other reasons than those mentioned and Dr. Gibbs' statements still sound very strange to me.

 

[Barque]

Nevertheless, I guess there are other reasons than those mentioned and Dr. Gibbs' statements still sound very strange to me.

I'm curious about what impression you have of the US way of life. I believe American life in the 19th century, especially in small towns, was very different from and very conservative compared to modern times. I've heard that parts of America were much more puritan than Europe at that time.

 

[shootingstar]

I've heard that parts of America were much more puritan than Europe at that time.

Thank you. Yes, I've considered this as well and that's why I've suspected the customs and practices of the Congregational Church could be the real reason for Dr. Gibbs' statements. However, there isn't any reaction except yours out there in this regard, I'm afraid.

 

[Barque]

that's why I've suspected the customs and practices of the Congregational Church could be the real reason

I didn't use "puritan" in its religious sense if that's what you mean. I used it just to mean "traditional" or "conservative". I mean I think conservative attitudes were prevalent among many people, not just members of the Congregational Church.

 

[shootingstar]

Yes, I understand what you mean. In this respect, however, one thing leads to another. The churches preserved the general feeling and behavior of those day, and they embodied the traditions and customs of their members. Still, I'd say there were differences between these churches - one was more prudish the other less so regarding its customs and practices, but all that is only guesswork for sure, isn't it?

 

[5jj]

We seem to be getting rather a long way away from the original question. All we know for sure is that Dr and Mrs Gibbs had not met before their wedding day. Guesswork about how this happened gets us nowhere. The situation is not so 'impossible' as you thought.

 

[shootingstar]

Guesswork about how this happened gets us nowhere

Exactly that, however, is my question in the OP. I'd like to get a well-founded explanation of that strange mode of behavior actually. Maybe it was hard for a man to win a wife in those days not only in the west but also in the east of the US as you suggested, perhaps, above. Nevertheless, it sounds quite strange to me if they got married without having seen each other before.

 

[5jj]

The subject is beyond the scope of a language forum, so I am closing the thread now. It's had a reasonable airing.