Pleased with, the price was high, the temperature was good, at the last moment

[Rachel Adams]

Do parts marked by asterisks sound natural? Could you check the rest of the text too, please?
I can't still use italics.

"How was your vacation? *Are you satisfied?* We haven't had good weather this year. When I was in Paris *I was lucky with the weather* and *the temperature was good.* All was good only *the price was high for everything*/*price was high for everything*/everything was expensive. *I am pleased for you.* I wanted to go to Moscow but *at the last moment* I changed my mind and went to Paris. I am very *pleased with* the trip."

 

[teechar]

Before we start fixing the mistakes, who are you writing this to? It sounds choppy.

 

[Rachel Adams]

Before we start fixing the mistakes, who are you writing this to? It sounds choppy.

It's not a message. I am interested in grammar and structure of these sentences.

 

[teechar]

Do the parts marked by asterisks sound natural? Could you check the rest of the text too, please?
I [STRIKE]can't[/STRIKE] still can't use italics.

"How was your vacation? Are you satisfied? [ 1] We haven't had good weather this year. When I was in Paris, I was lucky with the weather and the temperature was good. All was good, except/but [STRIKE]only *the price was high for everything*/*price was high for everything*/[/STRIKE] everything was expensive (there). I am pleased for you. I wanted to go to Moscow but at the last moment, I changed my mind and went to Paris. I am very pleased with the trip."

[ 1]: That's unnatural. You might say "Did you enjoy yourself?" or "Did you have a good time?".

 

[5jj]

It's not a message. I am interested in grammar and structure of these sentences.

I think you are going about things the wrong way. Grammar, unless you are a grammarian, is a means to an end, not an end in itself. The 'end' is a natural communication in English. Your three lines are unnatural from start to finish. Teechar's "choppy" was a very good word for how it comes across. You need to write something that you actually want to say in English and then we can correct the grammar.

I have tried below to illustrate what I mean with comments on your original, ignoring the grammar:

"How was your vacation? Are you satisfied? We haven't had good weather this year. ( A big jump from asking about their holiday to talking about your experience of the weather this year. ) When I was in Paris I was lucky with the weather and the temperature was good. (Another jump from this year's weather to the weather when you were in Paris) All was good only the price was high for everything/price was high for everything/everything was expensive. (Another jump from weather to prices). I am pleased for you. (An enormous leap back to the person you are writing to.) I wanted to go to Moscow but *at the last moment* I changed my mind and went to Paris. I am very pleased with the trip. (Another leap back to your holiday.)"

 

[Yankee]

Do parts marked by asterisks sound natural? Could you check the rest of the text too, please?
I can't still use italics.

"How was your vacation? *[STRIKE]Are[/STRIKE] Were you satisfied?* We haven't had good weather this year. When I was in Paris *I was lucky (or "happy with" with the weather* and *the temperature was good.* All was good only *the price was high for everything*/*price was high for everything*/everything was expensive.(my preference) *I am pleased (or "happy") for you.* I wanted to go to Moscow but *at the last moment* (OK) I changed my mind and went to Paris. I am very *pleased (or "satisfied") with*the trip."

A few possible alternatives.