[Grammar] Reductions

[MeysamAman]

Hi
I've written a sentence using "reductions"; I'm wondering whether it's right:

"Returning home from work, entirely fatigued, one finds home a safe haven of peace and tranquility in which alongside his or her family they can soothe their mind and nerves."

What I wanna know is that using ", entirely fatigued," after "returning home from work" in a reduction form like that is right or not.
I would appreciate your help.

 

[Odessa Dawn]

***NOT A TEACHER***

What I [STRIKE]wanna [/STRIKE]want to know is that using ", entirely fatigued," after "returning home from work" in a reduction form like that is right or not.

Already answered here.

 

[TheParser]

Hi
I've written a sentence using "reductions"; I'm wondering whether it's right:





***** NOT A TEACHER *****


Hello, MeysamAman:

I want to congratulate you on working so hard to write a sentence.

I think that the answer to your question is YES.

That is, it is, I believe, correct to use "entirely fatigued" after "Returning home from work."

Let me see if I can make up a similar sentence:

"Waking up at 7 a.m., entirely refreshed, I was ready to face a new day."

*****

May I most respectfully suggest a few little changes to your very nice sentence?

Maybe something like:

"Returning home from work, entirely fatigued, one finds a safe haven of peace and prosperity where one can soothe both the mind and nerves in the company of one's family."


P.S. When you use "one," it sounds a little formal and distant. Perhaps some people might want to change "one" to "you" and change "one's" to "your." And, of course, "one finds" becomes "you find." You could also say: "Returning home from work, entirely fatigued, a person finds a safe haven of peace and prosperity where they can soothe both the mind and nerves in the company of their family." (In 2014, many native speakers now use "they" and "their" to refer one person. Most speakers no longer use "he" and "his" in such a sentence.)



James

 

[MeysamAman]

james, I'm really grateful for your broad, thorough, and very useful reply. I used your apposite remarks, and replaced my words with your suggestions. Thanks again
MeysamAman

 

[emsr2d2]

As OdessaDawn pointed out (and linked to), your question had already been comprehensively answered on another forum. Whilst you can, of course, post in two different forums, it is polite to let us know if your question has already been answered. Is there a reason you came here for more opinions? Did you have a problem with the information given to you over at EnglishForums?

In addition, there is no need to write a new post to say "Thank you" and no need to quote entire answers back at us. Simply click on the "Thank" button in the bottom left-hand corner or any post you find helpful.

 

[MeysamAman]

hi, "emsr2d2"
let me explain: 1- I'm really sorry for being inconvenient, I'm new here 2- I didn't get any answer even close to what I meant, there in EnglishForums, let alone been "comprehensively" answered!! 3- I didn't see any, actually there wasn't any, such "thank" or otherwise button you are talking about 4- there is only one option to reply, "reply with quote", I don't know how to reply otherwise; please help me on that.

 

[Matthew Wai]

.. sorry for being inconvenient ...

People usually say 'sorry for the inconvenience caused'.

Not a teacher.

 

[Barb_D]

Hi MeysamAman,

It takes a little bit of time to learn how a forum works. Don't worry.

The "thank" button is under the post you are reading on the left. There is one for "like" (I agree) and one for "thank" (thank you for this answer).

You should see some buttons under the post on the right. There is one for "reply" and one for "reply with quote." Use the quote only when necessary. It makes the pages very long!

Thanks and welcome.

 

[Barb_D]

I don't see it as "reduced." It is simply an phrase that describes the person as they return home.