which became the starting point

[keannu]

Self practice

The Ritidian beach is most beautiful beach ... ​

​

It is located near the Anderson Air Force Base. People avoided using that area because the US Military occupied that beach. Therefore, wildlife naturally gathered in that area to avoid people. The US Navy donated that area to the US Fish and Wildlife Service in 1993, which became the starting point of the Ritidian point.
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I'm not sure if everything is OK in the writing.

 

[Rover_KE]

I have moved your thread.

When you want your own writing to be edited or proofread, please post it here in Editing & Writing Topics.​

​

 

[Tarheel]

Perhaps:

It's the most beautiful beach I've seen.

I would imagine that civilians weren't allowed there while the military was using the area.

Wildlife was there in numbers because people weren't there.

I don't understand the underlined part.

 

[keannu]

Perhaps:

It's the most beautiful beach I've seen.

I would imagine that civilians weren't allowed there while the military was using the area.

I don't understand the underlined part.

This means after the donation, [FONT=&#48148]Ritidian beach started to be known as a tourist attraction, so I changed like this.[/FONT]

The US Navy donated that area to the US Fish and Wildlife Service in 1993, [FONT=&#48148]which became its starting point as a tourist attraction,[/FONT]

 

[Tarheel]

That's OK.