is my sentence correct?

[ahmin92]

I had my supper at Subang Jaya SS15 and when I'm about to head back home, I passed by Public Bank and saw an Indian with some envelopes on his hands, rushing out from the bank and knocking a gold Honda Civic , so I guessed the car owner had forgotten to take his stuff and he was like didn't know there was a guy knocking his car and he just drove away. I was at the back of his car so I kept flashing and honed him but he seemed like getting frighten and just drove faster.

Guys, if any of you or your family have a gold Honda Civic and went to SS15 Public Bank just now, please tell them that they might left something in the bank.

 

[bhaisahab]

I had my supper at ss15 and when im about to head back home, i passed by public bank and saw an indian uncle knocking a gold honda civic with some envelopes , so i guessed the car owner has forgotten to take his stuff and he was like didnt know there was a guy knocking his car and he just drove away. i was at the back of his car so i kept flashing and honed him but he seemed like getting frighten and just drove away...

so..guys. if any of you or your family have a gold honda civic and went to ss15 public bank just now, please tell them that they might left something in the bank.

What is your question?

 

[Barb_D]

I'm sorry, but I can't understand this at all.

What is ss15? What is an indian uncle? What was he doing with the envelopes? How did he get them and how did he know they were supposed to go to the man in the car? How do you know that was about the bank and not something else?

The one thing I can tell you for sure is that you need to capitalize "I" as well as other proper nouns, like "Honda Civic."

 

[ahmin92]

What is your question?

Is my grammar correct? and does it look fluent to you?

 

[ahmin92]

I'm sorry, but I can't understand this at all.

What is ss15? What is an indian uncle? What was he doing with the envelopes? How did he get them and how did he know they were supposed to go to the man in the car? How do you know that was about the bank and not something else?

The one thing I can tell you for sure is that you need to capitalize "I" as well as other proper nouns, like "Honda Civic."

Is it better now? I'm sorry for that.

 

[Gillnetter]

I had my supper at Subang Jaya SS15 (I assume that this is the name of a restaurant) and when [STRIKE]I'm[/STRIKE] I was about to head back home, I passed by ( a or the) Public Bank and saw an Indian with some envelopes [STRIKE]on[/STRIKE] in his hands, rushing out from the bank and knocking on a gold Honda Civic. [STRIKE], so [/STRIKE]I guessed the car owner had forgotten to take his stuff and he [STRIKE]was like [/STRIKE]didn't know there was a guy knocking on his car and he just drove away. I was [STRIKE]at the back of [/STRIKE] behind his car so I kept flashing my lights and [STRIKE]honed [/STRIKE] honked at him but [STRIKE]he[/STRIKE] it seemed that he was [STRIKE]like [/STRIKE]getting frighten and just drove faster.

[STRIKE]Guys,[/STRIKE] If any of you or your family have a gold Honda Civic and went to SS15 Public Bank just now, [STRIKE]please tell them that they [/STRIKE] you or they might left something in the bank.

"knocking a gold Honda Civic" is incorrect. One knocks on something.
One does not carry something "on" his hands, he carries something "in" his hands.
One does not "flash". It is correct to say that one "flashes his lights" - in this case.
The correct word is "honked", not "honed".
It is better to not use the word "guys", except in very informal situations.
I assume that SS15 has some meaning but I don't know what it is.

 

[ahmin92]

"knocking a gold Honda Civic" is incorrect. One knocks on something.
One does not carry something "on" his hands, he carries something "in" his hands.
One does not "flash". It is correct to say that one "flashes his lights" - in this case.
The correct word is "honked", not "honed".
It is better to not use the word "guys", except in very informal situations.
I assume that SS15 has some meaning but I don't know what it is.

SS15 is a name of a place. example. in Malaysia, I'm staying in Selangor(state) living in Subang jaya(city) and having my supper at ss15(a place/an area in Subang Jaya, we have ss14, ss15, ss17,ss18, usj 1, usj 2, usj 3 and so on, they all are in Subang jaya)

 

[emsr2d2]

So SS15 is like a postcode? If the only people who are reading this are going to understand that without an explanation, then fine. If you are expecting other people to read it then you'll need to be clearer.

If I told you that I really like going to SW19 every summer because I'm a fan of a particular sport, would you have any idea what I was talking about?