A paragraph from my short story

Bassim

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Mar 1, 2008
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Student or Learner
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Bosnian
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Bosnia Herzegovina
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This is the paragraph from a short story I am currently writing. In the part before this, my narrator had been given some kind of sleeping drug by a group of soldiers who stopped him in the woods. Now he wakes up in a cell.
Would you please correct my mistakes. I feel that probably some sentences do not sound natural.

I came to in a narrow room with the concrete floor. A thin mattress with a blanket and a pillow lay in one corner and, in another, a washbasin and a toilet made from stainless steel. A single fluorescent tube in the high ceiling cast a pale light. The room had no windows, just a square vent through which a weak flow of air came inside. The silence was eerie, as if I was sealed in a tomb. I had only my briefs and t-shirt on. They had taken everything from me, included my watch. I still refused to believe this was reality. This must have been an awful nightmare from which I was going to wake up any moment and return to normal life again.
 

teechar

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Feb 18, 2015
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English Teacher
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Iraq
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This is [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] a paragraph from a short story I am currently writing. In the part before this, [STRIKE]my[/STRIKE] the narrator had been given some kind of sleeping drug by a group of soldiers who stopped him in the woods. Now he wakes up in a cell.
Would you please correct my mistakes? I feel that probably some sentences do not sound natural.

I came to in a narrow room with [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] a concrete floor. A thin mattress with a blanket and a pillow lay in one corner and, in another, a washbasin and a toilet made from stainless steel. A single fluorescent tube in the high ceiling cast a pale light. The room had no windows, just a square vent through which a weak flow of air came inside. The silence was eerie, as if I was sealed in a tomb. I had only my briefs and t-shirt on. They had taken everything from me, included my watch. I still refused to believe this was happening to me. [STRIKE]reality. This[/STRIKE] It must have been an awful nightmare from which I was going to wake up any moment and return to normal life again.
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