and even then . . . ?

[Coffee Break]

Hello everyone. I encountered this expression, "and even then . . . ?", but am struggling to understand it. Could you please let me know what it means in the following sentences:

[Clara speaking] “Tell!”
[The protagonist speaking] “Tell . . .” I repeated her command, trying to make light of it. “Tell what?”
[Clara speaking] “Well, for one thing, tell why there’s so little to say.”
I didn’t know why there was so little to say. Because there’s so little about me I care to talk about before knowing it’s quite safe to—and even then . . . ? Because the person I am and the person I wish I were at this very moment in the bar aren’t always on speaking terms? Because I feel like a shadow right now and can’t fathom why you can’t see this? What was she really asking me to say?

- André Aciman, Eight White Nights, Second Night

This is a novel published in the United States of America in 2010. This novel is narrated by the nameless male protagonist. The protagonist meets Clara at a Christmas party in Manhattan. The night after the party, the protagonist meets Clara again at a bar. They start talking, and Clara asks him to talk about himself.

Here, I wonder what the underlined expression means.
My only guess is that it might mean "even when I knew it is safe to talk about myself", but I am not sure what is hidden in those "..." and the question mark.

I would very much appreciate your help.

 

[emsr2d2]

In this context it means:

I don't like to talk a lot about myself until I know it's safe to do so. Even when I know it's safe ... [I still don't like to talk about myself much].

 

[Coffee Break]

@emsr2d2,

Thank you very much for the explanation.
So "even then..." means "even when I know it's safe to talk a lot about myself [I still don't want to talk about myself]". The hidden words in "..." is in []!

But, this is just my small question, but would this question mark mean that he is not sure about talking about himself even then...? Or would it be that it is added to make the whole sentence, starting from "Because", as a question, perhaps...?

 

[emsr2d2]

I think the question mark expresses a doubt in the speaker's mind about what he's saying. You could read it as if there's an implied "Is it" before "because". It's a rhetorical question. He's having a conversation with himself (in his head).

 

[Coffee Break]

@emsr2d2,

Thank you very much for the explanation.
So this question mark is expressing a doubt in the speaker's mind! It is intended to turn the whole "because" sentence into a question.
Then this question might be: "Is it because there's so little about me I want to talk about before knowing it's safe to talk about myself, and also because, even when I know it is safe to talk about myself, I don't talk about myself?"

I sincerely appreciate your help, for letting me understand.

 

[probus]

The part you've put in bold face means exactly that: even when she is certain it's perfectly safe to talk about herself, she prefers not to do so.

 

[Tarheel]

Both Clara and the unnamed protagonist are odd birds. Most people would say: "Tell me why ...." But Clara is clearly not most people.