Appointment for Vaccination

[rajan]

I have observed that while reading a English newspaper or a magazine, I have a habit to see whether I can parse those sentences grammatically or not. Sometimes, I feel whether I am reading newspaper or checking my grammar to know whether I can make those type of sentences or not. This, I have been doing for a long time. Also, there is a realisation that though it may be a good habit to parse the sentense to check our own grammar, I can improve my grammar skills further by writing some notes. In that series, here I am writing a small note. I would be grateful if you could help me to improve the following note by finding out grammatical errors.

"My boss had to visit Kenya. It was required that he be vaccinated for protection against a yellow fever disease which was prevalent there. Otherwise, he would have been quarantined while coming back to India at the airport. Only few days were left to his leaving to Kenya. I got the appointment at a government hospital for him for the next day. I came to know that there used to be a long queue in the hospital for it. I did not want a person of his status to stand in a long queue. Time was limited as we got the appointment for the next day. By going out of the way, with lot of efforts, I searched a doctor in that hospital through one of my references who could facilitate that process. Next day in the morning, I reached one hour early when my boss was supposed to reach in the hospital to meet that doctor in his office to apprise the status of my boss and to see the place where he was to be vaccinated so that at the time of his arrival at the hospital I could show him the way to the vaccination centre. Side by side, I was requesting my boss over phone to reach on time. Though he was assuring me that he would reach on time, he reached one hour late. When my boss reached, I received him at the gate of the hospital and took him to the Doctor’s office where they both had a tea and had a friendly conversation. After that Doctor took my boss to the vaccination centre and instructed one of his colleague there to get him vaccinated first. Though that was his work, he should have been in a hurry but I was taking pain. Until this process got over, I was nervous.

While coming back in his car, my boss thanked me and appreciated my efforts."

 

[Charlie Bernstein]

I have observed that while reading a English newspaper or a magazine, I have a habit to see whether I can parse those sentences grammatically or not.

With my local daily, no one can!

Sometimes, when I read a newspaper, I check the grammar to [FONT=Verdana, Arial, Tahoma, Calibri, Geneva, sans-serif]learn to[/FONT] make those types of sentences [STRIKE]or not[/STRIKE]. This[STRIKE],[/STRIKE] I have been doing for a long time. Also, there is a realisation that though it may be a good habit to parse the senten[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Tahoma, Calibri, Geneva, sans-serif]ces[/FONT] to check [FONT=Verdana, Arial, Tahoma, Calibri, Geneva, sans-serif]my[/FONT] own grammar[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Tahoma, Calibri, Geneva, sans-serif].[/FONT] I can improve my grammar skills further by writing some notes. In that series, here I am writing a small note.

Series? I think you want a different word.

I would be grateful if you could help me to improve the following note by pointing out grammatical errors.

[STRIKE]"[/STRIKE]My boss had to visit Kenya. It was required that he be vaccinated for protection against [STRIKE]a[/STRIKE] yellow fever, [STRIKE]disease[/STRIKE] which was prevalent there. Otherwise, he would have been quarantined while coming back to India at the airport. Only a few days were left before leaving for Kenya. I got the appointment at a government hospital for him for the next day. I found out there were long queue at the hospital for it. I did not want a person of his status to stand in a long queue. Time was limited, so we got the appointment for the next day. By going out of the way, with lot of effort, I found a doctor in that hospital through one of my references who could facilitate that process. Next [STRIKE]day in the[/STRIKE] morning, I arrived one hour before my boss was supposed to reach [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE] the hospital to meet the doctor in his office to apprise the status of my boss and to see the place where he was to be vaccinated so that at the time of his arrival at the hospital I could show him the way to the vaccination centre.

That sentence is long! Try breaking it up.

[STRIKE]Side by side,[/STRIKE] I asked my boss over phone to be on time.

If you and he were side by side, you wouldn't have needed a phone.

Though he assured me that he would [STRIKE]reach on time[/STRIKE], he arrived an hour late. When he got there, I met him at the gate of the hospital and took him to the doctor's office, where they [STRIKE]both[/STRIKE] had [STRIKE]a[/STRIKE] tea and [STRIKE]had[/STRIKE] a friendly conversation. After that, the doctor took my boss to the vaccination centre and instructed one of his colleagues there to get my boss vaccinated first. That my boss's responsibility, so he should have hurried, but I was taking pains. Until this process was over, I was nervous.

While coming back in his car, my boss thanked me for my efforts.[STRIKE]"[/STRIKE]

Only use quotation marks for direct vebatim quotes.