[General] I don’t think there’s a Starbucks rule there to force people...

[Silverobama]

Kris and I were in a new Starbucks. When we came in (still a bit far from the counter) the waiter asked if we wanted to drink something. Because the waiter was in loud voice and not very nice, Kris asked me if we would be asked to get out of there if we didn’t buy a cup of drink there. I then said to Kris:

I don’t think there’s a Starbucks rule there to force people who don’t purchase drinks there; we can sit there as we want.

The above sentence is factually true. The same situation could be applied to McDonald’s and KFC restaurants here.

Is my italic sentence natural?

 

[Rover_KE]

No — for a start you've used 'there' too often and inappropriately.

 

[GoesStation]

And the first clause doesn't say what the customers aren't being forced to do.

Start over on this one.

 

[teechar]

My friend Kris and I [STRIKE]were in[/STRIKE] went into a new Starbucks. When we were [STRIKE]came in ([/STRIKE] still a bit far from the counter, the [STRIKE]waiter[/STRIKE] person serving asked if we wanted to drink something. Because [STRIKE]the waiter[/STRIKE] he/she was [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE] loud [STRIKE]voice[/STRIKE] and not very nice, Kris asked me [STRIKE]if[/STRIKE] whether we [STRIKE]would[/STRIKE] might be asked to get out [STRIKE]of there[/STRIKE] if we didn’t buy something. [STRIKE]a cup of drink there.[/STRIKE] I then said to Kris:

I don’t think there’s a Starbucks rule [STRIKE]there to force[/STRIKE] requiring people who don’t purchase something to leave. [STRIKE]drinks there;[/STRIKE] We can stay. [STRIKE]sit there as we want. [/STRIKE]

The above sentence is factually true. The same situation could be applied to McDonald’s and KFC restaurants here.

What do you mean by that?

 

[Silverobama]

No — for a start you've used 'there' too often and inappropriately.

Got it. I didn't notice that there were four "there" in the sentence.

And the first clause doesn't say what the customers aren't being forced to do.

I notice that teechar already corrected my sentences. I'm sorry for the delay; I wasn't on the computer.

What do you mean by that?

We can stay at any Starbucks here without buying a cup of drink and so can we in McDonald's and KFC here. We don't need to buy anything there but we can sit there and, say, have an English club.

 

[teechar]

The same [STRIKE]situation could be applied[/STRIKE] applies to McDonald’s and KFC restaurants here.

.

 

[emsr2d2]

We can [STRIKE]stay at[/STRIKE] sit in any Starbucks here without [STRIKE]buying a cup of[/STRIKE] food or drink. [STRIKE]and so can[/STRIKE] We can do the same in McDonald's and KFC here. We don't need to buy anything [STRIKE]there[/STRIKE] but we can sit there and, say, have an English club.

Please note my corrections above.