it is us

[Taka]

Recently, I've come across this sentence:

Someone has to do this now, it is our destiny, if it is us that everyone, expects us to have the mission won.

I wonder if the underlined part is grammatically OK or not.

What do you native speakers think? Do you think it sounds fine as it is?

 

[bhaisahab]

Recently, I've come across this sentence:

Someone has to do this now, it is our destiny, if it is us that everyone, expects us to have the mission won.

I wonder if the underlined part is grammatically OK or not.

What do you native speakers think? Do you think it sounds fine as it is?

No, it's not OK. It's meaningless.

 

[Taka]

Without the second 'us' as:

if it is us that everyone, expects to have the mission won.

would it work?

 

[bhaisahab]

Without the second 'us' as:

if it is us that everyone, expects to have the mission won.

would it work?

No, the comma makes it meaningless.

 

[Taka]

The original has that comma, so I left it uncorrected.

Without that comma, only the second one here would work?

...if it is us that everyone expects us to have the mission won.
...if it is us that everyone expects to have the mission won.

 

[5jj]

...if it is us that everyone expects us to have the mission won.
...if it is us that everyone expects to have the mission won.

Neither works. The words are meaningless; it makes no difference what punctuation you add or take away.

 

[Tdol]

You can get the idea, but it's a dog's dinner of a sentence.

 

[Taka]

A dog's dinner. Really!?

Here is the comment I found beside the lyrics from which the sentence was excerpted:

... here are the Yamato lyrics as re-written by Mike Vescera, which are actually a pretty faithful translation of the original.

 

[CarloSsS]

NOT A TEACHER

As far as song lyrics are concerned, sort of everything goes and the authors of them often do not bother with correct grammar or meaningful phrases. And there is always the possibility that someone just made a typo when writing the lyrics.

 

[Tdol]

A dog's dinner. Really!?

Here is the comment I found beside the lyrics from which the sentence was excerpted:

... here are the Yamato lyrics as re-written by Mike Vescera, which are actually a pretty faithful translation of the original.

It may be faithful, but dogs are faithful to their dinner- it's a mess.

 

[Taka]

As far as song lyrics are concerned, sort of everything goes and the authors of them often do not bother with correct grammar or meaningful phrases.

I can tell that this one, which is the original translation, doesn't work:

it is us that everyone expects us to have the mission won.

But this one seems to work, at least from a grammatical point of view.

it is us that everyone expects to have the mission won.

I'm wondering why it still wouldn't work either.

but dogs are faithful to their dinner- it's a mess.

The original Japanese version, of which he made a translation into English, is beautifully written. I can tell you that.

 

[5jj]

But this one seems to work, at least from a grammatical point of view.

it is us that everyone expects to have the mission won.

Three native speakers, all of them experienced teachers, have told you that it does not work. Continuing to post it will not change that.

 

[Taka]

Then, let me ask this way.

Why wouldn't it work as a cleft sentence like these? What is the difference?

It was George who/that arrived first at the meeting.
It was English that George studied at Oxford.
It's you that I need.

 

[Barb_D]

It is us (though some would argue "we" is better) that (though some might argue "who") everyone expects to win.

Everyone expects that we will win.
Eveyone expects us to win.
It is we who are are expected (by everyone) to win.
It is we/us expected to have won by now.

Those all work, more or less. The original simply did not.

 

[5jj]

'... to have the mission won' is the main problem. I really have no idea what it is supposed to mean. Even if we try something new: It is us that everyone expects to win the mission, which looks better grammatically, I still don't know what it is supposed to mean.

 

[Taka]

'... to have the mission won' is the main problem.

AH! That part! I didn't pay much attention to it. You're right. It doesn't really make sense.

Thanks!

 

[5jj]

AH! That part! I didn't pay much attention to it. You're right. It doesn't really make sense.

Thanks!

Phew.

Can you try now some alternative versions in English? Don't worry too much about their grammatical accuracy - we can deal with that. Just try to get across the message you would like to convey.

 

[Taka]

Visit here and read the article under the title 'Production run. Space Battleship Yamato', if you have time.

Space Battleship Yamato - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

You can get the idea what mission they have.