Maria, the only child of her parents

[Bassim]

Would you please correct my sentences in this short text? I am not sure if some of my phrases sound natural, so please would you correct them to make them sound proper English?

Maria, the only child of her parents, returned home in tears after only one week of her marriage.
"What's wrong, daughter?" her mother asked.
"My husband wants me to cook every day," she said.
"You poor soul," her mother said sighing deeply. "I've been doing that for more than 25 years, and you see, I'm still alive and in good health."

 

[teechar]

Would you please correct my sentences in this short text? I am not sure if some of my phrases sound natural. [STRIKE], so please would you correct themto make them sound proper English?[/STRIKE]

Maria, [STRIKE]the only child of[/STRIKE] her parents' only child, returned home in tears after only one week of [STRIKE]her[/STRIKE] being married. [STRIKE]marriage.[/STRIKE]

"What's wrong, love?" [STRIKE]daughter?"[/STRIKE] her mother asked.
"My husband wants me to cook every day," she said.
"You poor soul," her mother said sighing deeply. "I've been doing that for more than 25 years and, [STRIKE]and[/STRIKE] you see, I'm still alive and kicking!" [STRIKE]in good health."[/STRIKE]

.

 

[emsr2d2]

I wouldn't bother with "of her parents" or "her parents' " where you've got it. I'd say "Maria, an only child, returned home to her parents after ..."

Using the endearment "love" might not work in every variant of English but we certainly wouldn't use "daughter" there. You could stick with just "What's wrong?" or use "What's wrong, Maria?"



I'd change the end of the conversation to "You poor soul! It's the 21st century! Tell him he does half the cooking or the marriage is over. Men!! Honestly!!"