Need some langulage correction

Bashir2017

New member
Joined
Aug 8, 2017
Member Type
Academic
Native Language
Arabic
Home Country
Lebanon
Current Location
Lebanon
Dear all
I wrote this paragraph as part of some work but not sure if it is completely written nicely and correct

"When respondents were asked, " are you willing to pay a certain amount of money as official fees for safe and clean water", 79.6 % of respondents answered "yes". One can read the reasons behind this percentage; since 81% of the respondents are currently purchasing water, it would not be an issue for them to pay a certain amount of money for more sustainable and healthier water"

Hope to hear from you
 
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emsr2d2

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Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
Dear all
I wrote this paragraph as part of [strike]some[/strike] a longer piece of work but I'm not sure if it is [STRIKE]completely[/STRIKE] written [STRIKE]nicely and[/STRIKE] correctly.

When respondents were asked (no comma here) "Are you willing to pay a certain amount of money [STRIKE]as[/STRIKE] in official fees for safe and clean water?", 79.6% of respondents answered "Yes". One can [STRIKE]read[/STRIKE] infer the reasons behind this percentage; since 81% of the respondents are [STRIKE]currently[/STRIKE] already [STRIKE]purchasing[/STRIKE] paying for water, it would not be an issue for them to pay a certain amount [STRIKE]of money[/STRIKE] extra for more sustainable and healthier water.

Hope to hear from you.

See my suggested changes above. The respondents were asked about "clean and safe water". At the end, you said they wouldn't mind paying for "more sustainable and healthier water". "Clean and safe" can be covered by "healthier" but "sustainable" doesn't seem to refer to the original question.
 
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