on May 28

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Ksenia

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Today, (on) May 28, 2016, the day of uncovering of Relics of St. Elias, the brethren and piligrims of Svyatogorsk Lavra prayerfully honoured God's Saint. Metropolitan Arseny in concelebration of the whole Lavra's clergy held a moleben with Akathist to the Eldery, the Patron of Donbass and the whole of our district. The icon of Saint and silver-gilded reliquary in form of a miter, made in 2015 for the part of the precious Head of St. Elias, were taken out of sancrisity for popular adoration.

Is "on" necessary in this context?
Should you have any other remarks, please let me know.

Thank you.
 
No. In fact, it would be wrong.

When you write brethren, do you mean monks? Unless the archaic plural brethren is used normally by Anglophones associated with the church, you should write "brothers".
 
Today, [STRIKE](on) [/STRIKE]May 28, 2016, the day of the uncovering of the relics of St. Elias, the [STRIKE]brethren[/STRIKE] monks/brothers and [STRIKE]piligrims[/STRIKE] pilgrims of Svyatogorsk Lavra [STRIKE]prayerfully[/STRIKE] honoured God's Saint through prayer/by praying.

Metropolitan Arseny (I don't know what that means) in [STRIKE]concelebration[/STRIKE] a joint celebration [STRIKE]of[/STRIKE] with the whole of Lavra's clergy, held a moleben (that's not an English word) with Akathist to the Eldery (are you sure about that word?), the Patron of Donbass and the whole of our district. The icon of the saint and a silver-gilded reliquary in the form of a miter, made in 2015 [STRIKE]for the[/STRIKE] as part of the precious head of St. Elias, were taken out of the [STRIKE]sancrisity[/STRIKE] sacristy for [STRIKE]popular[/STRIKE] adoration by many people.

Is "on" necessary in this context?
Should you have any other remarks, please let me know.

Thank you.

See above. As you can see, I have some queries about some of the terminology.
 
See above. As you can see, I have some queries about some of the terminology.

I appreciate your reply.
Metropolitan - in most Eastern Orthodox churches, a bishop who is head of an ecclesiastical province and ranks next below the patriarch.
Moleben is a prayer service.
Yes, you are right. It should be "Elder" not "Eldery".
 
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No. In fact, it would be wrong.

When you write brethren, do you mean monks? Unless the archaic plural brethren is used normally by Anglophones associated with the church, you should write "brothers".

Yes, I mean monks.
I used to say "brethren".
So, I should use "brothers" not "brethren", correct?
 
Yes, I mean monks.
I used to say "brethren".
So, I should use "brothers" not "brethren", correct?

Yes. Brethren is an archaic plural of brother. A pacifist anabaptist denomination active in my area of Ohio is called the Church of the Brethren. Other than when referring to that church and its members, and possibly in some old hymns, the word is never used in modern English.
 
The Plymouth Brethren are alive and well, and so are Freemasons, who use the word all the time.
 
When you write brethren, do you mean monks? Unless the archaic plural brethren is used normally by Anglophones associated with the church, you should write "brothers".

Given the rest of the text, which is heavy duty stuff, brethren doesn't stand out as that archaic to me.
 
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