Opening speech

Status
Not open for further replies.

yslamac

Member
Joined
Jan 24, 2014
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
Hong Kong
Current Location
Hong Kong
I am preparing for my writing exam and hoping that someone can correct my opening speech below. Thank you!:-D

Topic: It has been circulating in the air that Associate Degrees are created by the Government to cover up the high rate unemployment. As an Assistant to the Director of the Bureau of Education, you are asked to draft a speech and prepare notes for the Director when he or she meets the public. You are to defend the position that the purpose of Associate Degrees are educational in nature and are not measures to mask unemployment. You are also to put forward the position that it is important for cost of Associate Degrees to be paid by the user.


Good morning everyone, I appreciate all of your attendance to today’s forum. The launching of Associate Degree Scheme has become the subject of a heated debate in our city, in light of its effectiveness and underlying intentions. As the Director of Education Bureau, it is my duty to share with the public the government’s stance on Associate Degree.

It is generally accepted that education is important to our community, as one would be civilized and broaden horizons through their learning journey. It is the Education Bureau’s vision that every students can have the access to higher education for their better future. However, only approximately 18 percent of our secondary school students enter university as told by the report, implying most of the students would end their studies at secondary level.

There are critics complaining about the limited places at university, suggesting the government should increase the quotas, in a bid to achieve “100 percent-university-graduates” for our community. Although we appreciate the way how they make suggestions for the good sake of Hong Kong, it will definitely add more burdens to the fiscal revenue and we believe students should be stratified to learn better.

We often hear that the implementation of Associate Degree is to mask unemployment, and such a claim is unfair to people and teachers who have put effort in the program. And I have to reiterate that the genuine purpose of “Associate Degree” is to educate. This faith can be better illustrated by how the program operates. It is a two-year studies provided for students who have completed secondary education and wish to pursue further studies. There are different programs students can choose from, which include science, arts, social science and media. All the professors and teaching staff are qualified and have good reputation in their subject field. According to the report commissioned in 2016, it shows that 88 percent of the students are satisfied with their learning, suggesting our determination in running the program and providing quality education for all students.

Although unemployment among teenagers is one the government’s concerns, obviously there is no need to implement such a labor-intensive policy as many measures have already been put forward to boost teenage employment. For instance, the government has cooperated with the business sector to provide vacancies for students who have decided to work. Also, vocational trainings are available to equip youngsters with skills and techniques for them to work in blue-collar industries like food and construction industries. Clearly, the policy is to educate rather than masking unemployment.

It is our responsibility to prepare our future generations with different opportunities that are important to their life journey, and I cordially hope that the public would understand what the government has done for the community.
 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
Who gave you this topic? When are you going to give the speech? How many marks are available for it?
 

yslamac

Member
Joined
Jan 24, 2014
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
Hong Kong
Current Location
Hong Kong
It is a sample question from a website and the target audience is the general public. You can take the total score as 100.
 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
When are you going to submit it to be marked?
 

yslamac

Member
Joined
Jan 24, 2014
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
Hong Kong
Current Location
Hong Kong
Actually, no one is going to mark it. I write it for the preparation of the upcoming exam (officer recruitment in HK), as there is a possibility to examine candidates on their ability to draft an opening speech. Since I seldom write such kind of thing, I want to seek advice from teachers on this forum for better preparation.
 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
OK, thank you for clarifying that you are not asking us to help you with an assignment or homework which will be marked.
 

teechar

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Feb 18, 2015
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
Iraq
Current Location
Iraq
I am preparing for my writing exam and hoping that someone can correct my opening speech below. Thank you!:-D

Topic: It has been [STRIKE]circulating in the air[/STRIKE] said that associate degrees are created by the government to cover up the high rate of unemployment. As an Assistant to the Director of the Bureau of Education, you are asked to draft a speech and prepare notes for the Director when he or she meets the public. You are to defend the position that the purpose of associate degrees [STRIKE]are[/STRIKE] is educational in nature and [STRIKE]are[/STRIKE] not [STRIKE]measures[/STRIKE] a ploy to mask unemployment. You are also to put forward the position that it is important for the cost of associate degrees to be paid by the student. [STRIKE]user.[/STRIKE]


Good morning everyone, I appreciate [STRIKE]all of[/STRIKE] your attendance [STRIKE]to[/STRIKE] at today’s forum. The launching of the Associate Degree Scheme has become the subject of a heated debate in our city, [STRIKE]in light of[/STRIKE] especially regarding its effectiveness and underlying intentions. As the Director of the Education Bureau, it is my duty to share with the public the government’s stance on associate degrees.

It is generally accepted that education is important to our community, as it leads to [STRIKE]one would be[/STRIKE] a more civilized and enlightened society. [STRIKE]broaden horizons through their learning journey.[/STRIKE] It is the Education Bureau’s vision that every student can have [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] access to higher education for their better future. However, only approximately 18% [STRIKE]percent[/STRIKE] of our secondary-school students enter university as [STRIKE]told by[/STRIKE] stated in [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] a recent report commissioned in 2016, implying most [STRIKE]of the[/STRIKE] students [STRIKE]would[/STRIKE] end their studies at secondary level.

There are critics complaining about the limited places at university, suggesting the government should increase the quotas, in a bid to achieve an 70 percent-university-graduates” [STRIKE]for[/STRIKE] rate in our community. Although we appreciate their valuable [STRIKE]way how they make[/STRIKE] suggestions, [STRIKE]for the good sake of Hong Kong, it will definitely[/STRIKE] we believe that would represent an added [STRIKE]more[/STRIKE] burden to the Hong Kong budget [STRIKE]fiscal revenue and we believe[/STRIKE] students should be stratified to learn better.

We often hear that the implementation of the Associate Degree Scheme was [STRIKE]is[/STRIKE] to mask unemployment, and such a claim is unfair to [STRIKE]people[/STRIKE] students and teachers who have put in great effort in the program. And I have to reiterate that the genuine purpose of associate degrees is to educate. This [STRIKE]faith[/STRIKE] can be better illustrated by how the program operates. It is a two-year course [STRIKE]studies[/STRIKE] provided for students who have completed secondary education and wish to pursue further studies. There are different programs students can choose from, which include science, the arts, social science and media studies. All the professors and teaching staff are qualified and have a good reputation in their subject field. According to the report cited above, [STRIKE]commissioned in 2016, it shows that 88 percent[/STRIKE] 88% of the students enrolled in associate degrees are satisfied with their learning, suggesting our determination in running the program and providing quality education for all students is justified.

Although unemployment among teenagers is one the government’s major concerns, obviously there is no need to implement such a labor-intensive policy as many measures have already been put forward to boost teenage employment. For instance, the government has cooperated with the business sector to provide vacancies for students who have decided to work. Also, vocational training programs are available to equip youngsters with skills and [STRIKE]techniques[/STRIKE] knowledge for them to work in blue-collar industries like the food-processing and construction industries. Clearly, the policy is to educate rather than to mask [STRIKE]ing[/STRIKE] unemployment.

It is our responsibility to [STRIKE]prepare[/STRIKE] provide our [STRIKE]future[/STRIKE] younger generations with different opportunities to help them succeed in their careers, [STRIKE]that are important to their life journey,[/STRIKE] and I [STRIKE]cordially[/STRIKE] truly hope that the public [STRIKE]would understand[/STRIKE] can appreciate what the government has done for the community with such initiatives as the Associate Degree Scheme.
I don't understand the highlighted text.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top