Patricia was busy with a nail file

[alpacinou]

Is this correct and natural?


Patricia was busy with filing her nails. Amanda stepped out of the shower in a turquoise bathrobe. She fumbled around in the closet and lifted the hair drier, struggling to untangle its wire. "Pat, I really think we need a new drier. This is a piece of of junk."

Patricia stopped filing. "You should have bigger worries Amanda. The report Ms Chase wants is due in three days." She started filing again. "You know she can be a cruel boss. Get to work or she may give you the boot."

"Says the employee of the year, filing her nails."

"My report is ready. Done and dusted," answered Patricia.

Amanda put her hand under her chin. "What was that euphemism for ass-kisser? Um, sycophant, I guess."

Patricia gave her a sideways glance. "I hope you can still pay half the rent after you are fired, otherwise I will find a new roommate."

"Don't worry Pats. I will tell that loser Max write me a report."

"Oh yeah? How?"

"I will seduce him."

"Is this a wise career planning strategy?" asked Patricia. "And what if you can't seduce him?"

"Oh please! He is easy meat. I can seduce a piece of rock if I want to. He is easy meat," Amanda said again, dropping her bathrobe and twirling naked. She put her hands on her hips and said, "Look at me Pats. Who can resist this?"

Patricia rolled her eyes. "Tell you what. You get Max to write your report for you, and I'll do the dished the rest of the month."

"You're on." Amanda then walked towards the drawer, grabbing a bra from inside.

"I don't remember you being so cocky," said Patricia.

"It's called confidence young woman," answered Amanda adjusting her bra strap.

On their carpool to the office, they shook hands on the bet. In her attempts to entice Max, Amanda had worn a skimpy skirt and a skintight sheer blouse. Max's desk was a few steps from Amanda's. Before walking towards him, Amanda winked at Patricia. Max was small guy with curly hair and soulful eyes. She was drinking chocolate milk when she arrived. "I love chocolate milk," said Amanda, giving him a flirty smile.

Maxed looked up at her, surprised. "Good morning Amanda. How are you doing today?"

Amanda sighed, furrowing her brows, pretending to be upset. "Not very well, Max. It's just that I've been super busy with stuff and I haven't had time to write that report Ms. Chase is expecting."

"Oh. That's a bummer."

She put her hands on his desk, showing off her cleavage. "I was wondering if...never mind."

"What?"

"I was wondering if you would be a gentleman and write the report for me." She grabbed the chocolate milk bottle, licking its collar. "I will do anything you ask in return for this massive favor," she said in a lustful tone.

Max was unimpressed. "Okay. I'll do it. But I have one condition."

Amanda turned her head, looked at Patricia triumphantly. "What's your condition max?"

"You have to convince your friend Patricia to go on a date with me."

 

[probus]

Patricia was filing her nails, not grinding them.

You ought to know by now, alpacinoutd, that you need to give us the source of any text you ask about. If it's your own, say so. If not, tell us where you found it.

 

[alpacinou]

Patricia was filing her nails, not grinding them.

You ought to know by now, alpacinoutd, that you need to give us the source of any text you ask about. If it's your own, say so. If not, tell us where you found it.

It's my own.

I thought it's a bit awkward to write this: she was busy with a nail file, filing her nails. Maybe I just put it like this: She was busy filing her nails.

 

[Charlie Bernstein]

Is this correct and natural?


Patricia was [STRIKE]busy with[/STRIKE] filing her nails. Amanda stepped out of the shower and put on a turquoise bathrobe.

She fumbled around in the closet for the hair drier, struggling to untangle its cord. "Pat, I really think we need a new drier. This is a piece of of junk."

Patricia stopped filing. "You should have bigger worries, Amanda. The report Ms Chase wants is due in three days." She started filing again. "You know she can be a cruel boss. Get to work or she may give you the boot."

"Says the employee of the year, filing her nails."

"My report is ready. Done and dusted," answered Patricia.

Amanda put her hand under her chin. "What was that euphemism for ass-kisser? Um, sycophant, I guess."

Patricia gave her a sideways glance. "I hope you can still pay half the rent after you get fired. Otherwise I'll find a new roommate."

"Don't worry, Pats. I'll get that loser Max to write me a report."

"Oh yeah? How?"

"I'll seduce him."

"Is this a wise career planning strategy?" asked Patricia. "And what if you can't seduce him?"

"Oh please! He's easy meat. I can seduce a piece of rock if I want to. He's easy meat," Amanda said again, dropping her bathrobe and twirling naked. She put her hands on her hips and said, "Look at me, Pats. Who can resist this?"

Patricia rolled her eyes. "Tell you what. You get Max to write your report for you, and I'll do the dishes the rest of the month."

"You're on." Amanda went to her dresser and grabbed a bra from a drawer.

Hold on. You're not done yet. A bet hass two sides, right? If Amanda wins, Pats does the dishes. But if Amanda loses, what does Pats win?

By the way, there's a similar bet in the old American musical Guys and Dolls.

"I don't remember you being so cocky," said Patricia.

"It's called confidence, young woman," answered Amanda, adjusting her bra strap.

On their carpool to the office, they shook hands on the bet. In her attempt to entice Max, Amanda had worn a skimpy skirt and a skintight sheer blouse. Max's desk was a few steps from Amanda's. Before walking towards him, Amanda winked at Patricia. Max was small guy with curly hair and soulful eyes. She was drinking chocolate milk when she arrived. "I love chocolate milk," said Amanda, giving him a flirty smile.

Max looked up at her, surprised. "Good morning, Amanda. How are you doing today?"

Amanda sighed, furrowing her brows, pretending to be upset. "Not very well, Max. It's just that I've been super-busy with stuff, and I haven't had time to write that report Ms. Chase is expecting."

Americans put periods after Mr., Mrs., and Ms. I don't think the British do. (Standing by for correction!) So you have to pick one way and stick with it. Remind me, do you aim for American or British English?

"Oh. That's a bummer."

She put her hands on his desk, showing off her cleavage. "I was wondering if...never mind."

"What?"

"I was wondering if you'd be a gentleman and write the report for me." She grabbed the chocolate milk bottle, licking its collar. "I will do anything you ask in return for this massive favor," she said in a lustful tone.

Max was unimpressed. "Okay. I'll do it. But I have one condition."

Amanda turned her head, looked at Patricia triumphantly. "What's your condition, Max?"

"You have to convince your friend Patricia to go on a date with me."

Good punchline. But can't Pats overhear them?

Here's a month's supply of commas:

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Use them!

 

[alpacinou]

Here's a month's supply of commas:

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Use them!

Thank you very much Charlie. Sorry about the commas.

I will change the bet. Something about dinner or something like that.

I aim to write American English.