[Essay] PLEASE HELP ME SEE MY MOTIVATION LETTER

serenaaanh

New member
Joined
Sep 16, 2021
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Vietnamese
Home Country
Vietnam
Current Location
Vietnam
Please help me check grammatical errors in my motivation letter.

Many thanks in advance. Really appreciated for your help. Love <3

With this letter, I would like to submit my application and express my motivation for enrollment in XXX

When I studied in the final year of secondary school, I saw my elder brother working as a tour guide. I admired him, not only his language competences, but also his management of all the issues of clients. After I passed the entrance exam to study in a prestigious high school in my hometown, I was allowed to accompany my brother’s tour, and he told me different stories about the destination. From here, I recognized that becoming a part of tourism and hospitality will enlighten new chances to be fluent in languages, and especially discover all the corners of our world, from nature to humans and culture. Growing up, thanks to listening to my heart and understanding my feelings and my passion, I had a clear orientation career. While my brother was a tour guide, I tended to do occupations related to hotel management, because this job can create good services for people.

Based on my orientation, the agreement from my family as well, I determined to choose Hospitality as my career path. In order to prepare for studying, I acknowledged that only fluency in English and high academic results could be my effective foundation and tool. I considered it as the time I practiced playing my favored instruments, and I became an amateur zither and cellist at the age of 16. During my high school life, as my observation, there was no professional training environment in Hospitality in Vietnam. By contrast, studying in an international environment was pretty professional and beneficial for language improvement.. Hence, I decided to study overseas. In Vietnam, studying in the powerhouse countries, such as England, America, or Australia, etc. was more popular than Asean countries. Nevertheless, I firmed my decision to study in Malaysia, due to its professional training environment for hospitality students, and its collaboration with XXX

Currently, I am a third year student in Hospitality, and my very first impression and pride is the formal uniform. Whenever I wear it, it reminds me to never stop pursuing my dream, hospitality will give me more chances to explore the world. When studying in this major, I am equipped with a wide range of knowledge and fundamental skills, therefore, I can apply it into reality through practical classes at school. Besides, school also teaches me how to listen and understand myself, how to overcome my fear and always be positive in any situation.

Although I have not had much experience in Hospitality, I accumulate valuable experience for myself through practical classes. I will start my internship in 2022. For me, to be an effective manager, the first critical thing is possessing and applying all the fundamental competences well, including: interpersonal skills, management skills, leadership skills, etc. Additionally, it is indispensable that a manager understands himself and other people, hence, he can manage his team effectively. In the smokeless industry, the demand of clients changes and increases on a day-to-day basis, therefore, it requires the managers and other staff to manipulate not only their traditional competences, but also their flexibilities, high EQ, which can satisfy the requirements and emotions of clients.

Until now, I really enjoy all the subjects in my school, especially Wine and Beverage Class, which helped me explore a new world of wine. After I finished that semester, I continued to take my time to enroll in some online courses and read more related books. Furthermore, wine brought me to romantic France, specially the vineyard in Bordeaux and all the attractive wine cellars. Due to the reputation of hospitality, and the French wine, I was totally convinced to believe that France will be a good environment for me to pursue studying wine. From that moment, I began studying French, and I also looked for more information about Hospitality and wine in France, and I found XXX. I was impressed by the first day when I received an email from XXX. I was also impressed that XXX has various campuses in different countries in the world, including my hometown - Vietnam. The partnerships and collaborations of XXX are all from famous hotels and vineyards in the world. I truly desire to study Wine in XXX. I am a persistent girl. Since I was a kid, no matter how busy my studying was I still spent time practicing instrument, and now, I became a tutor in teaching instruments. That’s why I have my persistence to follow my passionate career. I'm also a girl who is interested in discovering new points in different aspects, focusing on the details, the secrets behind it. For instance, when observing a bartender makes a cocktail, I will not only desire to know what kind of spirits and ingredients are being used, but I also wanna know the story behind it, why the bartender mixes these ingredients and the mood of both bartender and clients. And lastly, I appreciate the cultural diversity in the studying environment of XXX, I can learn from others, exchange cultures with others from various backgrounds. Although the year of 2020 was affected seriously by a pandemic, hence I could not participate in an international volunteer project, I still had chances to join public project online in Vietnam and in Asean. -

I believe that my studying time in XXX will provide me with sufficient knowledge and opportunities to intern work in different countries. I always desire to be an expert in hospitality, study and taste many sorts of wine, and understand the stories behind it. My dream is to assimilate my abilities and knowledge to work in re-owned hotels and restaurants, and become a sommelier and wine consultant. At the same time, I also can contribute to the development of the wine culture among people in my hometown.

 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
Before we help you, please check the information in your member profile. It currently says your native language is Welsh. That seems distinctly unlikely. Please correct any errors in your profile.
 

teechar

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Feb 18, 2015
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
Iraq
Current Location
Iraq
To the OP: I see you have changed the info on their profile page, but it still doesn't match up with your IP. Are you really in Vietnam?
 
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