[Grammar] Please just check my writing.

[yjso21]

[FONT=&#44404]Story 1.
A study has found that peer influences on achievement. The type of friends that adolescents have actually makes a difference in their school performance. It appeared especially in two areas: academic performance and delinquency. Youngsters whose friends were more academically oriented did better over the course of high school than students who had less academically oriented friends. Similarly, students whose friends were more delinquent developed more problems themselves than students who had less delinquent.

Story 2.
This is story about Colin’s early memories in great love for his family. One day he was playing on the floor and stuck a hairpin into an electrical outlet. His grandmother and parents were scolding and fussing him because they were worried about him. He was lacked drive. He was not much of athlete or musician either. Still He was a contented kid, growing up in the warmth and security of the concentric circles his family formed.



I summarized a story . Please check my summary if there are grammar errors.
I really need someone to help me out with my English writing but I have no one to do so.
I'll be waiting for your help. [/FONT]

 

[billmcd]

Story 1.
A study has found that peers can influence[STRIKE]s[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]on[/STRIKE] personal achievement. The type of friends that adolescents have actually can make [STRIKE]s[/STRIKE] a difference in their school performance. It can appear[STRIKE]ed[/STRIKE] especially in two areas: academic performance and delinquency. Youngsters whose friends were more academically oriented did better over the course of high school than students who had less academically oriented friends. Similarly, students whose friends were more delinquent developed more problems themselves than students who had [STRIKE]less[/STRIKE] a lower rate of delinquency.

Story 2.
This is story about Colin’s early memories [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE] of great love for his family.[STRIKE] One day he was playing on the floor and stuck a hairpin into an electrical outlet. [/STRIKE] (This statement is not really relevant to your summary. Any child is likely to do this.) His grandmother and parents frequently scolded [STRIKE] and fussing [/STRIKE] him because they were worried about him. He [STRIKE] was [/STRIKE] lacked drive. He was not much of an athlete or musician either. Still he was a contented kid, growing up in the warmth and security of the concentric circles his family formed.



I summarized a story . Please check my summary if there are grammar errors.
I really need someone to help me out with my English writing but I have no one to do so.
I'll be waiting for your help.

b.