[Grammar] Regarding my Medical insurance.

SaudHaq

New member
Joined
Apr 14, 2020
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
Hindi
Home Country
India
Current Location
Saudi Arabia
Dear Sir,

How are you doing?

I would like to inform you that my and my family's medical insurance has been closed by my last company.

Once they accepted and approved my iqama transfer request, they closed all our medical insurance.

So now me and my family are without medical insurance.

Could you please sir, help me out in this matter?

Thank you.

Regards,
Saud
 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
Dear Sir,

[STRIKE]How are you doing?[/STRIKE] (Inappropriate in a formal letter)

I would like to inform you that my and my family's medical insurance has been [STRIKE]closed[/STRIKE] cancelled by my last [STRIKE]company[/STRIKE] employer.

Once they accepted and approved my iqama transfer request, they [STRIKE]closed[/STRIKE] cancelled all our medical insurance.

[STRIKE]So[/STRIKE] Consequently, [STRIKE]now me and my family[/STRIKE] we are now without medical insurance.

Could you [STRIKE]please sir,[/STRIKE] help me out in this matter?

[STRIKE]Thank you.[/STRIKE]

[STRIKE]Regards,[/STRIKE]

Yours faithfully

Saud + surname

Welcome to the forum. :hi:

Please note my corrections above. If you start a letter with "Dear Sir", you should finish with "Yours faithfully". If you start with "Dear + name", end with "Yours sincerely". Are you certain that the person you are writing to is male? If so, but you don't know his name, "Dear Sir" is OK. If you're not sure of their gender, use "Dear Sir/Madam" or "To Whom It May Concern" (although this isn't used much these days). In my opinion, you're more likely to get help if you find out the person's name and address the letter to them personally, ie "Dear Mr Jones/Dear Ms Jackson".

I have no idea what an "iagma transfer request" is, so I have left it as it is.
 

Charlie Bernstein

VIP Member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Member Type
Other
Native Language
English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
United States
All Em's suggestions are good. Another change you might make: Change I would like to inform you that my and my family's medical insurance . . . . to I write to inform you that my family medical insurance . . .

It's more concise and means the same thing. Remember: In business letters, short sentences are better than long ones.
 

tedmc

VIP Member
Joined
Apr 16, 2014
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
Malaysia
Current Location
Malaysia
Who are you writing to and what help do you want?
 
Top