Survey report - please can you help and correct my writing

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veneziadrive

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I'm going to do a language exam, and this is another writing attempt of mine. Would you please help correct my mistakes and let me know how I should improve?
Thank you.

Survey Report

Based on the complaining survey I have received from the fellow student I would like to say a few words regarding to the most important changes that we are going to make in our school. The survey was submitted by our pupils because they think that some of the school’s facilities need to be renewed. There are two most necessary improvements for us to take a closer look. Reviewing the results, it is crístal clear that the school’s gym’s equipment is outdated and needs to be improved. Therefore the first thing to plan on having changed must be the gym, where the students would be able to their morning and afternoon Physical Education classes. By the way, 82% of our students thought this is the most necessary thing to do. Secondly, 57% of the learners would like to have the library re-stocked with new books instead of the old ones.
As being the principal here I have to agree with these requests and in my authority I will do everything I possibly can to make these improvements happen.
 

emsr2d2

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What is a "complaining survey"? Note that that suggests that it is the survey which is complaining.
 

veneziadrive

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This was the task.


unnamed.jpg
 
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teechar

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Survey Report

Based on the [STRIKE]complaining[/STRIKE] findings of the survey about what facilities at school need to be improved, I will highlight in this report which of the school facilities need urgent improvement. ["complaining survey" means the survey is complaining. ;-)] [STRIKE]I have received from the fellow student I would like to say a few words regarding to the most important changes that we are going to make in our school. The survey was submitted by our pupils because they think that some of the school’s facilities need to be renewed. There are two most necessary improvements for us to take a closer look.[/STRIKE] [Avoid waffle.] Reviewing the results, it is crystal clear that the school’s gym equipment is [STRIKE]outdated[/STRIKE] very old and needs to be replaced. [STRIKE]improved.[/STRIKE] Therefore, the first thing to plan on [STRIKE]having changed[/STRIKE] renovating must be the gym, where the students would be able to their morning and afternoon Physical Education classes. [STRIKE]By the way,[/STRIKE] 82% of [STRIKE]our students[/STRIKE] respondents in the survey thought this is the most necessary thing to do. Secondly, 57% of [STRIKE]the learners[/STRIKE] those who participated in the survey would like to have the library re-stocked with new books instead of the old ones we currently use.
As [STRIKE]being the[/STRIKE] principal, [STRIKE]here[/STRIKE] I [STRIKE]have to[/STRIKE] must say that I agree with these [STRIKE]requests[/STRIKE] points, and [STRIKE]in my authority[/STRIKE] I will do everything I possibly can to ensure [STRIKE]make[/STRIKE] these improvements are implemented speedily. [STRIKE]happen.[/STRIKE]
.
 
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