the hills were dressed in velvet

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alpacinou

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Hello,

I am trying to describe a green hill similar to this one:

Green_Hill,_Lancashire_(geograph_3020988).jpg

Can I use "velvet"? Does this work?

The hills were dressed in a thin verdant green velvet.

I know that's too many adjectives. I just want to know if it's correct.

Do you have a better suggestion? I want it to suggest the green layer is "thin". It's not like the hills are full of trees. Just a "thin layer" of green.
 

GoesStation

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I know that's too many adjectives. I just want to know if it's correct.
I'm glad you noticed the potential problem. :) I think this one works okay, though.
 

alpacinou

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Can I use "cloak" and "swathe" instead of "dress" as my main verb?
 

GoesStation

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Can I use "cloak" and "swathe" instead of "dress" as my main verb?
You can, but you should bear in mind that most people who think about the matter recommend plain language.
 

alpacinou

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You can, but you should bear in mind that most people who think about the matter recommend plain language.

I know. And while we are at it, does "shroud" work here as a verb?
 

GoesStation

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I know. And while we are at it, does "shroud" work here as a verb?
Not really. You're writing about what someone can see. "Shroud" focuses on what's hidden.
 

Charlie Bernstein

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Can I use "cloak" and "swathe" instead of "dress" as my main verb?
Yes. But they have different connotations.

Swathe suggests a bandage. Cloak suggests subterfuge.
 

Charlie Bernstein

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In the context of talking about green hills, how does that work and what does it mean?
When you say dressed, velvet, and verdant (which is redundant because it means green), you're creating a pleasant, peaceful, bucolic scene.

If you say cloak, swathe, or shroud, it makes it more ominous. The best word choice depends on the mood you want to create.
 

alpacinou

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When you say dressed, velvet, and verdant (which is redundant because it means green), you're creating a pleasant, peaceful, bucolic scene.

If you say cloak, swathe, or shroud, it makes it more ominous. The best word choice depends on the mood you want to create.

I found this example in the dictionary:

Her neck was swathed in jewels.

Is it ominous?
 
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