Richard Braintree
New member
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2016
- Member Type
- Interested in Language
- Native Language
- French
- Home Country
- France
- Current Location
- France
Hello everyone.
First of all, thanks for your time.
I recently made a short video containing some text in french language.
I would like this video to be available to the non french speakers, so I tried to translate it in english.
Here is what I've done, could you review it and correct what is wrong ?
You could have done
so many things.
Is it too late, already ?
Only you can tell.
"The first step is always the hardest"
Why not start with the second one ?
A nice trick, for sure !
Alas, quite the false move.
I would stop, and turn back, if not for my pride.
Drifting farther, I now face the consequences
With the dreadful feeling I've forgotten the gist
Why should I even go on ?
Had I taken a little step back,
I would have realised these limits were here
solely because I wished they were.
I crafted many pieces,
but they never belonged to the same puzzle.
How to get the full picture, then ?
I don't bother denying it anymore :
I lack something.
I won't seek the answer in other people's work,
lest I should find !
Then I could only concede
How wrong I was.
The irony...
I only wish to move on !
Where to go, where's the guiding theme ?
How can I deliver a message...
When I'm unaware of its content ?
Nobody ever gave me direction...
Did they ?
If so, I wasn't listening.
Suddenly, the solution appears :
Stop, and take stock.
A break is never a loss of time.
I needed insight, to get back to reality.
How am I supposed to shine ?
When there are already too many stars ?
Finally, the harshest critic...
was it me ?
Please, correct.
Thank you !
First of all, thanks for your time.
I recently made a short video containing some text in french language.
I would like this video to be available to the non french speakers, so I tried to translate it in english.
Here is what I've done, could you review it and correct what is wrong ?
You could have done
so many things.
Is it too late, already ?
Only you can tell.
"The first step is always the hardest"
Why not start with the second one ?
A nice trick, for sure !
Alas, quite the false move.
I would stop, and turn back, if not for my pride.
Drifting farther, I now face the consequences
With the dreadful feeling I've forgotten the gist
Why should I even go on ?
Had I taken a little step back,
I would have realised these limits were here
solely because I wished they were.
I crafted many pieces,
but they never belonged to the same puzzle.
How to get the full picture, then ?
I don't bother denying it anymore :
I lack something.
I won't seek the answer in other people's work,
lest I should find !
Then I could only concede
How wrong I was.
The irony...
I only wish to move on !
Where to go, where's the guiding theme ?
How can I deliver a message...
When I'm unaware of its content ?
Nobody ever gave me direction...
Did they ?
If so, I wasn't listening.
Suddenly, the solution appears :
Stop, and take stock.
A break is never a loss of time.
I needed insight, to get back to reality.
How am I supposed to shine ?
When there are already too many stars ?
Finally, the harshest critic...
was it me ?
Please, correct.
Thank you !