Wuthering Heights: repetition of a personal pronoun

[Walt Whitman]

When Lockwood felt better, Zillah, the housekeeper, handed him a candle, took him upstairs to his bedroom and gave him some strange advice: she told him to be quiet, because she was putting him in a room that her master never let anyone use.

Does it sound unnatural to repeat the pronoun “him” so many times?
Is there a better way to write the sentence?

Thank you
WW

 

[5jj]

Does it sound unnatural to repeat the pronoun “him” so many times?
Is there a better way to write the sentence?

No.
There are other ways, not necessarily better, for example:

When Lockwood felt better, Zillah, the housekeeper, handed him a candle, led the way upstairs to his bedroom and gave some strange advice: she said he should be quiet, because she was putting him in a room that her master never let anyone use.

 

[Walt Whitman]

Is it quite wrong or just bad English?

 

[emsr2d2]

It's neither wrong nor bad English.

 

[jutfrank]

Emily Brontë is widely considered to be an excellent writer.

 

[Barque]

I don't think that line is from the original book. It sounds like a line from a simplified version.

 

[Tarheel]

@Walt Whitman Two things. One, do you really think it's bad writing? Two, you haven't given anybody any likes.

 

[Barque]

Does it sound unnatural to repeat the pronoun “him” so many times?

It'd be unnatural if the writer had kept saying "Lockwood". I think the repetition of "him" is fine.

 

[jutfrank]

I don't think that line is from the original book. It sounds like a line from a simplified version.

Ah, yes, you're right. This is not from the original Wuthering Heights.

 

[Walt Whitman]

I was perplexed. Then, I saw 5jj change “Yes” to “No”, and I felt relieved.

Barque is right. I’ve been working for some time on a simplified version of the original text. It’s for personal use only. I love Emily Brontë’s only novel. The passage was just my attempt at simplifying the beginning of chapter 3.

 

[Walt Whitman]

@Walt Whitman Two things. One, do you really think it's bad writing? Two, you haven't given anybody any likes.

1. I don't.
2. Done.

 

[5jj]

I was perplexed. Then, I saw 5jj change “Yes” to “No”, and I felt relieved.

I thought I'd changed it before anybody read my original post. Sorry. I'd misread the question.

 

[Barque]

I read your original post too and was wondering what to make of your next line that said "There are other ways, not necessarily better ..." I didn't realise you'd changed it till I saw Walt Whitman's #10.