While hunting, Bob almost accidentally shot

[Bassim]

Would you please correct my mistakes? I feel that my sentences do not sound natural..

While hunting, Bob almost accidentally shot his friend he mistook for a bear. The man was known under the sobriquet "Bear", thus unknowingly living up to his nickname.

 

[SoothingDave]

He was known by the nickname "Bear."

 

[Bassim]

Is it correct in the above sentence to use "sobriquet" to avoid to writing twice "nickname" in the same sentence?

 

[teechar]

While hunting, Bob almost accidentally shot his friend whom he mistook for a bear. That man's nickname, fittingly, was "Bear".

.

 

[SoothingDave]

I don't think very many native speakers know the word "sobriquet."

 

[Charlie Bernstein]

And I'd say "accidentally almost shot," not "almost accidentally shot." That would mean he did shoot him and it wasn't quite an accident!

 

[Charlie Bernstein]

I don't think very many native speakers know the word "sobriquet."

Sure we do! It's a dessert, isn't it?

 

[emsr2d2]

Would you please correct my mistakes? I feel that my sentences do not sound natural..

While hunting, Bob almost accidentally shot his friend he mistook for a bear. The man was known under the sobriquet "Bear", thus unknowingly living up to his nickname.

You won't have to say nickname twice if you put the whole thing into one sentence:

While hunting, Bob nearly accidentally shot his friend, mistaking him for a bear, almost ensuring his friend lived up to his nickname, "Bear".

 

[Tdol]

Do we need both accidentally and mistook?

 

[emsr2d2]

That's a good point. Also, if he had really mistaken his friend for a bear while out hunting for bear, it wouldn't have been accidental shooting if it had happened. He would have been shooting on purpose at what he thought was a bear.

 

[Bassim]

After all advice and corrections, I think I should write my sentence like this:

While hunting, Bob nearly shot his friend, mistaking him for a bear, almost ensuring his friend lived up to his nickname, "Bear."

 

[emsr2d2]

That looks good to me, except that the full stop at the end should be outside the quotation marks.