A scary accident

[Anna232]

Are the underlined parts idiomatic?
Context: it is an actual story. I am not sure the underlined parts are grammatical.

I wanted to thank you for saving me. After I fell into a river from a bridge I was terified. After knocking my head, I started to drown and in a moment I stopped seeing anything. When I was falling unconscious I thought I was going to fall to my death. The doctors said by some miracle there was a boat where I tried to climb and it saved me. You saw me and called the emergency services and I actually ended up surviving. I don't know how to pay you for your salvation. It is really great to know that in any moment someone can help me or save my life.

 

[5jj]

it is an actual story.

What do you mean by that?

 

[emsr2d2]

I wanted want to thank you for saving me. After I fell into a river from a bridge, I was terrified. After knocking hitting/banging my head on [name of object], I started to drown drowning and in a moment within seconds, I stopped seeing anything could no longer see.

When As I was falling unconscious losing consciousness, I thought I was going to fall to my death die. The doctors said told me that, by some miracle, there was a boat where I tried to climb nearby and it that's what saved me. You saw me, and called the emergency services and I actually ended up surviving survived.

I don't know how to pay you back. for your salvation. It is really great to know that in at any moment, someone can could help me or save my life.

See above. I'm pretty sure the reason for most of my corrections will be obvious but I'll explain one: "I thought I was going to fall to my death" is inappropriate in this situation. People fall to their deaths by falling off tall buildings, cliffs, down mountains or wells etc. The fact that you were still alive when you hit the water shows that you didn't "fall to your death" from the bridge.

 

[Anna232]

What do you mean by that?

The accident really happened.

 

[Anna232]

See above. I'm pretty sure the reason for most of my corrections will be obvious but I'll explain one: "I thought I was going to fall to my death" is inappropriate in this situation. People fall to their deaths by falling off tall buildings, cliffs, down mountains or wells etc. The fact that you were still alive when you hit the water shows that you didn't "fall to your death" from the bridge.

Thank you so much. Could you tell me if "I fell into the river" also works?
I used "I started to drown" because I thought both gerund and infinitive are correct. Why is it better to use gerund?

 

[teechar]

Context: it is an actual story. This really happened to me.

After I fell into a river from a bridge I was terified. After knocking my head,

That doesn't make sense. What hit your head, and did it happen after or before your fall?

 

[Tarheel]

Thank you so much. Could you tell me if "I fell into the river" also works?
I used "I started to drown" because I thought both gerund and infinitive are correct. Why is it better to use gerund?

"I fell into the river" is more natural.

For the other one, try: "I was afraid I was going to drown."

 

[Anna232]

That doesn't make sense. What hit your head, and did it happen after or before your fall?

It happened after.

 

[teechar]

And what was it that hit your head?

 

[Tarheel]

@Anna232 I would say I hit my head on something.

 

[Anna232]

And what was it that hit your head?

It was ages ago. I can't say what it was.

 

[Tarheel]

@Anna232 Would you like to try rewriting your story, keeping in mind the suggestions you received?

 

[Anna232]

@Anna232 Would you like to try rewriting your story, keeping in mind the suggestions you received?

I will try.