Gina had been on a diet

[Bassim]

Have I made any mistakes?

Gina had been on a diet for weeks, but when she saw chocolate bars by the checkout, she couldn't resist. She took a few of them from the rack and laid them on the belt, persuading herself she had done nothing wrong.

 

[Tarheel]

Have I made any mistakes?

Gina had been on a diet for weeks, but when she saw chocolate bars by the checkout, she couldn't resist. She took a few of them from the rack and laid them on the belt, persuading herself that she had done nothing wrong.

Then she changed her mind and put them back.

 

[Bassim]

I'm only wondering if that "that" you added is necessary. To my ear, the sentence sounds OK without that "that", but I'm probably wrong.

 

[Tarheel]

I'm 95% certain that it belongs there.

(That's why they put such things near the checkout--impulse purchases.)

 

[teechar]

It can be left out.

 

[GoesStation]

I'm only wondering if that "that" you added is necessary. To my ear, the sentence sounds OK without that "that", but I'm probably wrong.

It works fine for me either way.

 

[Bassim]

Editors of fiction say that whenever it is possible a writer should omit "that".