Is this correct?

[borogunner]

Hi everyone!

I'm writing to you from Italy, I am a musician and I'd like to know if these sentences are correct (I m writing a song )

the lines are:

1) So many times I loved this melody
and my doubt is: is this correct or I must use I've loved this melody? or are both correct?

2) This is my last melody , Played for some friends is this correct/enough? I want to say that the melody has been played for some friends, it has some sense how i wrote the line or it s totally wrong?

3) I'm so tired, my own way
is this line correct? talking about the meaning, I want to express the fact that I'm tired in my personal way , is correct? Can I use this in a song-poetry?

Thank you very much for your help!!

 

[teechar]

Hi everyone!

I'm writing to you from Italy. I am a musician and I'd like to know if these sentences are correct (I m writing a song).

Hello borogunner, and welcome to the forum.

The lines are:

1) So many times I loved this melody
and my doubt is: is this correct or [STRIKE]I must[/STRIKE] should I use "I've loved this melody", or are both correct?

I would use the past simple for that. However, note that song lyrics often do not follow grammar rules, so don't worry too much about that.

2) This is my last melody, played for some friends. Is this correct/enough? I want to say that the melody has been played for some friends. Does that make sense? [I don't understand that fully.] [STRIKE]it has some sense how i wrote the line or it s totally wrong?[/STRIKE]

3) I'm so tired, my own way.
Is this line correct? [STRIKE]talking about the meaning,[/STRIKE] I want to express the fact that I'm tired in my personal way. Is it correct? Can I use this in a song? [STRIKE]-poetry?[/STRIKE]

Thank you very much for your help!

Yes, that's fine, but see above.

 

[jutfrank]

1) So many times I loved this melody
and my doubt is: is this correct or I must use I've loved this melody? or are both correct?

I think I've loved is better. It doesn't affect the stress or rhythm, so it's easily changed.

2) This is my last melody , Played for some friends is this correct/enough? I want to say that the melody has been played for some friends, it has some sense how i wrote the line or it s totally wrong?

It's not clear to me whether last means 'final' or 'latest'.

3) I'm so tired, my own way
is this line correct? talking about the meaning, I want to express the fact that I'm tired in my personal way , is correct? Can I use this in a song-poetry?

I think in my own way is better.

Feel free to post the complete lyrics if you would like some constructive comments.