literacy issues due to child abuse

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NJ30M

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I don't consider myself completely illiterate by any means, but I do struggle tremendously with the foundations of reading and spelling. While in second grade I was both physically and emotionally abused by my teacher. This abuse became public after one of my classmates told their parents. Throughout elementary school my teachers were afraid to work with me thinking that I may falsely accuse them of abuse. Looking back my parents should have taken me out of the school, because with each passing year I began to fall further behind and lose confidence. By fourth grade I was enrolled in a "special" class and completely gave up on myself. Once any student is recognized by his peers as having to leave their mainstream class to attend a "special" class that student is immediately ostracized socially by his peers - even teachers think your hopeless. I continued to struggle through school - graduated from a mediocre college. During college I became aware that my issues during elementary school had impacted my literacy. I decided to take an IQ exam administered by my father's Mensa organization. I ended up scoring so well that I am now a Mensa member. Needless to say, I am completely frustrated by how the school system failed me in so many ways. I now work for a prestigious management firm in the entertainment industry. My biggest fear is that one day my illiteracy issues will become noticeable to my coworkers and I will lose my job. I'm desperately looking for help to relearn everything I missed in elementary school. I haven't been able to find any helpful resources online, so I thought I would reach out to this group for advice. Thanks so much!
 

NJ30M

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I'm looking for someone to work with me through chats/emails to improve my reading skills. I dont know where to start on my own.
 

Tdol

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I can't see that you have any literacy issues from your writing. When you talk about difficulties reading, what sort of problems do you have?
 

NJ30M

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That’s the thing. Most people ignore my problem once they sample my writing. Over the years I have memorized the pronunciation of words (I also mimic writing styles). Whenever I come across an unfamiliar word (particularly names) I don’t have the ability to separate words into syllables. I also struggle with diagraphs. All my life I have been getting away with this huge literacy problem. I go out of my way to avoid embarrassing situations. It’s difficult to correct this problem because I I work full-time and can’t find the time to get literacy help. I make a point to use dictionary.com every day to look up unfamiliar words. Prior to looking up the word I attempt to break it down into syllables. Then I look at the correct answer. Even with the answer in front of me I still struggle to understand why it is correct. I feel like I’m just memorizing everything again. I would love to find an email buddy to write when I come across these problems. I’m scared. I’m not sure how much longer I can pull this off at work.
 

Raymott

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That’s the thing. Most people ignore my problem once they sample my writing. Over the years I have memorized the pronunciation of words (I also mimic writing styles). Whenever I come across an unfamiliar word (particularly names) I don’t have the ability to separate words into syllables. I also struggle with diagraphs. All my life I have been getting away with this huge literacy problem. I go out of my way to avoid embarrassing situations. It’s difficult to correct this problem because I I work full-time and can’t find the time to get literacy help. I make a point to use dictionary.com every day to look up unfamiliar words. Prior to looking up the word I attempt to break it down into syllables. Then I look at the correct answer. Even with the answer in front of me I still struggle to understand why it is correct. I feel like I’m just memorizing everything again. I would love to find an email buddy to write when I come across these problems. I’m scared. I’m not sure how much longer I can pull this off at work.
NJ30M,
I do think you have a problem that needs addressing. In conditions of child abuse like this, it's not only the actual damage that's done, but also the feelings of inferiority and inadequacy.
You cannot score a Mensa level IQ without good verbal skills.
Instead of taking the hit and miss approach of looking for a penpal, I think you should have your literacy levels checked by a clinical psychologist who can assess where your blocks lie, and deal with them scientifically. This is your best chance in overcoming this problem.
 
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