Music is the manifestation of deep human feelings

[tedmc]

I think we normally say "incorporate A into B".

 

[alpacinou]

I think we normally say "incorporate A into B".

Music is a manifestation of deep human emotions and people also incorporate many of their cultural characteristics into their music.

 

[GoesStation]

Thanks everybody.

I guess I will go with this:

2. Music is a manifestation of deep human emotions and people also incorporate many of their cultural characteristics in their music.

That's still a run-on sentence. When you correct it, be sure to use "into".

 

[alpacinou]

That's still a run-on sentence. When you correct it, be sure to use "into".

Are you saying I should divide it into two separate sentences?

 

[alpacinou]

I don't agree that it's a run-on sentence, but I do think it would be better as two sentences. The thought expressed in the the two halves of your sentence are not connected enough to be simply joined by 'and'.

What do you think now?

1. Music is a manifestation of deep human emotions. People, moreover, incorporate many of their cultural characteristics into their music.
2. Music is a manifestation of deep human emotions. Moreover, people incorporate many of their cultural characteristics into their music.

 

[GoesStation]

What do you think now?

1. Music is a manifestation of deep human emotions. People, moreover, incorporate many of their cultural characteristics into their music.
2. Music is a manifestation of deep human emotions. Moreover, people incorporate many of their cultural characteristics into their music.

Number 2 is natural and correct. "Moreover" is misplaced in number 1.

 

[alpacinou]

Number 2 is natural and correct. "Moreover" is misplaced in number 1.

Finally, I have an okay sentence. I am happy. :lol:

 

[jutfrank]

Finally, I have an okay sentence. I am happy. :lol:

I wouldn't be. I don't like the use of the linker Moreover at all.

Also, are you sure you mean the word manifestation? I really don't think it's the right word. Perhaps you mean expression. Can you say exactly what you mean by 'manifestation'?

 

[alpacinou]

I wouldn't be. I don't like the use of the linker Moreover at all.

Also, are you sure you mean the word manifestation? I really don't think it's the right word. Perhaps you mean expression. Can you say exactly what you mean by 'manifestation'?

What linker would you use?

By manifestation, I mean human emotions are reflected in music.

 

[jutfrank]

What linker would you use?

First of all, you already have one: also. But why are you trying to link these two thoughts in the first place? What's the link you're going for? If you tell us that, we can advise you on which linker to use.

By manifestation, I mean human emotions are reflected in music.

No, I don't think that's what you mean. I think you mean 'expressed'.

 

[probus]

I've always felt that Bob Marley put it best in Trenchtown Rock:

"One good thing about music is when it hits you, you feel no pain."

 

[alpacinou]

First of all, you already have one: also. But why are you trying to link these two thoughts in the first place? What's the link you're going for? If you tell us that, we can advise you on which linker to use.

I want to connect two sentences which are about music. Since they are a bit different they cannot be put in one sentence. But they are connected.

 

[jutfrank]

Then also is enough.

 

[alpacinou]

Then also is enough.

I googled the difference between "also" and "moreover" and learned something new. :up:

 

[tedmc]

Music as a form of expression is deliberate. Music as a manifestation is perceived. They are quite different aspects and should be separated.