plural or not plural

[aha123]

Both you and your girlfriend should not go out together any more.


Both you should find a boyfriend for yourself.
Both you should find boyfriends for yourselves.


I am always confused with when to use plural. Which one in the above is correct?

 

[Barb_D]

What do you mean to say in your first sentence? Are you suggesting a couple break up?

If you are addressing two females (or, I suppose a gay male and a female, or two gay males):
Both of you should find a boyfriend.
Both of you should find boyfriends. (This is fine - it doesn't mean each should have several.)
You shoudl both find boyfriends.

 

[aha123]

What do you mean to say in your first sentence? Are you suggesting a couple break up?

In Asia, it is quite normal to go out with friends of the same sex, especially for young people. People in the West tend to have a phobia about this.

 

[Chicken Sandwich]

In Asia, it is quite normal to go out with friends of the same sex, especially for young people. People in the West tend to have a phobia about this.

What do you mean? You think that there is a phobia about men or woman going out together? I live in the West and there is absolutely no phobia about that. I'm a little bit surprised by your view. Perhaps I have mistunderstood your message.

 

[Barb_D]

There is no such phobia. I needed to understand your meaning. In fact, I still don't understand your meaning.

 

[emsr2d2]

The confusion may come from the use of "going out with". In BrE, that means "dating" or being "romantically involved".

I am going out with Simon, who lives on the other side of town = I am dating Simon.

If someone said "I think that you and your boyfriend should not go out together any more" I would be a) offended at them for sticking their nose into my business and b) probably determined to continue dating Simon.

From your original post, I think I have worked out that it is addressed to two girls who spend a lot of time in each other's company. Someone is suggesting that they should spend less time together and they should both find a boyfriend.

Remember that in BrE if you say to a girl "You and your girlfriend", you are assumed to be addressing a lesbian and talking about her female romantic partner. In AmE, a "girlfriend" can just be a female friend.

 

[5jj]

The confusion may come from the use of "going out with". In BrE, that means "dating" or being "romantically involved".

I agree that it very often means this, but it doesn't have to. The following sentences are spoken by a male, sexuality unknown:

1. Mary and I have been going out for six months.
2. Peter and I have been going out for six months.
3. I am going out with Mary this evening.
4. I am going out with Peter this evening.
5. I am going out with my mates this evening.

1. Dating/romantic involvement, heterosexual.
2. Dating/romantic involvement, gay.
3. Posssibly a date, though 'I' could be just going to the cinema/pub/ballet with a friend/colleague.
4. As for #3.
5. A group of friends are probably going to the pub.

Context will normally make the meaning clear. If the speaker wishes to lower the possibility of implication of dating in #3 and #4, he may rephrase them in some way, such as:

3. I'm going to see 'Les Mis' with Mary this evening. One of my students gave me a couple of tickets, and I remember Mary mentioning at school that she loved the show.
4. I'm going (out) for a pint with Peter this evening.

I'll just reiterate what Chicken Sandwich and Barb said. There is no such phobia as you suggested.

 

[emsr2d2]

I agree entirely with the examples 5jj. What I should have said was that "going out with + name of person of opposite sex" where "going out with" is almost a three-word phrasal verb means "dating".

"Going out + with + name of person of opposite sex" where it's the phrasal verb followed by a preposition and then a name, means "going somewhere with a friend".

I see "going out" and "going out with" as two separate verbs in a way.