[General] Talk with manager

[2010]

Manager: Why should I promote you?

Me: I think I would be a good fit for the next level. I have proved my mettle during my first assingment at XYZ. The results were the outcome of the training and coaching provided to the folks regularly. Subsequently, when I came back to ABC, I was given a new assingment in which I beleive I succeded. Currently, I have been given a new process to work with and already we have seen the difference in the scores from where it was. Therefore, I guess I deserve to be promoted.

Please help me if the above draft is okay. Any corrections or assistance is much appreciated!

 

[euncu]

Maybe you should get rid of all those I think, I guess, I believe stuff. They make you look insecure. And now that the question starts with why, you should start with Because.

 

[2010]

Maybe you should get rid of all those I think, I guess, I believe stuff. They make you look insecure. And now that the question starts with why, you should start with Because.

Would'nt that sound very optimistic.

 

[2010]

Any help please!

 

[casablanca_30391]

Manager: Why should I promote you?

Me: I think I would be a good fit for the next level. I have proved my mettle during my first assingment at XYZ. The results were the outcome of the training and coaching provided to the folks regularly. Subsequently, when I came back to ABC, I was given a new assingment in which I beleive I succeded. Currently, I have been given a new process to work with and already we have seen the difference in the scores from where it was. Therefore, I guess I deserve to be promoted.

Please help me if the above draft is okay. Any corrections or assistance is much appreciated!

-> I can state that I.....
-> Indeed
-> we have already
-> After all the success that I have been attempting to achieve, I believe I deserve to be promoted to work and donate better for your company
( I hope I can help u promted);-)

 

[Raymott]

Maybe you should get rid of all those I think, I guess, I believe stuff. They make you look insecure. And now that the question starts with why, you should start with Because.

to 2010:
I would keep "I believe". It's a sign of conviction. But not in the place you've used it. You could start with "I believe". I agree about getting rid of "I think" and definitely "I guess". You don't want your employer thinking that you guess about important things, especially at work.

 

[tedtmc]

Maybe you should get rid of all those I think, I guess, I believe stuff. They make you look insecure. And now that the question starts with why, you should start with Because.

I agree. To convince your employer to promote you, you have to be able to 'sell yourself'. Your letter should sound convincing and exude confidence, not with those wishy-washy phrases.

not a teacher