Use of comma in 'It is clear-cut that,'

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Offroad

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Dear teachers,

Is this sentence grammatically correct?

It is clear-cut that, lack of a job, desperation, frustration and debts, combined, can destroy anyone.

Would this one 'look' better due to its formality?

It is clear that some problems combined, such as X, Y and X, can destroy anyone.

Very much appreciated

Offroad
 

emsr2d2

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The second is much better as it is concise. In the first, the comma after "that" is not required.
 

BobK

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:up: Besides, what is the point of using 'clear-cut' here?

b
 
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