I really need help.I have to send this letter today!Please help me, checking it

[felliot]

Thank you very much,
and if you have any suggestion, please do not hesitate to write it! :)

THANKS


To the Kind Attention of:

xx

To Whom It May Concern

I am writing to introduce myself as a candidate for the Study Abroad Program.
My name is xx, I am an undergraduate student, enrolled in the second year of the Faculty of Political Sciences for the Cooperation and Development at the University of xx.
I have won an International Scholarship that allows students of University xx to study a semester at ZZ University , according to the bilateral agreement that ZZ University has signed with the University XX.

The reasons which lead me to propose my candidature reside in the knowledge that a learning experience in a prestigious university as ZZ University is, is a highly formative and fundamental step for my academic and personal growth as well as a unique opportunity to learn, in a stimulating International environment.
Also, I have a fervent interest and a big passion for languages and cultures different from mine, especially for English, American and Australian ones, and I am strongly motivated to learn, and to connect with people and different environments, facing a new life experiences, such as the radical change of places, habits and friendships.

I believe to be the ideal candidate to tackle this kind of experience, considering my skills, my perseverance and my commitment demonstrated during my studies and my work experiences, my ability to relate with others and work in teams, my ability to easly face problems even in situations of high stress and pressure. I am also certain that thanks to these skills, I won’t have any problem to integrate myself rapidly.

In addiction of my academic career, from the first year of University, I faced a variety of work experience, also to contribute to tuition fees and to not be an excessive economic burden for my family.
This, despite having slowed my studies, has turn to be very usefull, because has allowed me to learn how to manage my time and better organize my life schedule.

Currently, I work part-time in one of the most important NGOs, The “xx” and a few evenings a week I work as babysitter.

Thank you for your time and consideration.
Best Regards.

[Gillnetter]

Thank you very much,
and if you have any suggestion, please do not hesitate to write it! :)

THANKS


To the Kind Attention of:

xx

To Whom It May Concern

I am writing to introduce myself as a candidate for the Study Abroad Program.
My name is xx. I am an undergraduate student, enrolled in the and am in the second year of at the Faculty of Political Sciences for the Cooperation and Development at the University of xx.
I have won an International Scholarship that allows students of University xx to study a semester at ZZ University, according to the bilateral agreement that ZZ University has signed with the University XX.

The reasons which lead me to propose my candidature reside in the knowledge that a learning experience in a prestigious university such as ZZ University is, is a highly formative and fundamental step for my academic and personal growth as well as a unique opportunity to learn in a stimulating international environment.

Also, I have a fervent interest and a big passion for languages and cultures different from mine. I am especially interested for in English, both American and Australian. ones, and I am strongly motivated to learn and to connect with people and different environments and facing a new life experiences, such as the radical change of places, habits and friendships.
(It's unclear if you are talking about the English nation or the English language here.)
I believe to be I am the ideal candidate to tackle this kind of experience. considering My skills, my perseverance and my commitment have been demonstrated during my studies and my work experiences. My ability to relate with to others and to work in teams, coupled with my ability to easly easily face problems, even in situations of high stress and pressure, have been proved. I am also certain that, thanks to these skills, I won’t have any problems to in integrating myself rapidly.

In addiction addition of to my academic career, from the first year of university, I faced a variety of work experience, also to contribute to tuition fees and to not be an excessive economic burden for my family.
In addition to my academic career I have worked since my first year at the university. I did this to help pay for my tuition and not to be an economic burden to my family.

This, despite having slowed my studies, has turn to be very usefull useful because it has allowed me to learn how to manage my time and better organize my life schedule.

Currently, I work part-time in one of the most important NGOs, The “xx” and a few evenings a week I work as babysitter.

Thank you for your time and consideration.
Best Regards.

Here are some suggested changes.

[felliot]

Thank you very much for your help and your time Gillnetter.

I have appreciated!!!

:D