Please check my letter to the US college I would like to apply to

[Katue]

Hello!
My name's Kathy and I would like to apply to the US college next year. As I am a foreigner I need to get lots of information about the whole application procedure. And I need them to answer my letter so it should be perfectly correct. That's why I'm asking you to check my letter.

Here it goes.

Dear Sir/Madam,
I am writing to inquire about applying to Antelope Valley College as an international student. I would like to ask for information about special terms and conditions of application and admission for international students. I would appreciate if you could provide me with step-by-step application procedure guide.
I would be grateful if you could also review my case. I am a Russian student at the Russian State University for the Humanities. I’m getting my Information Security bachelor’s degree next June. So I’m planning to apply to your college. Moreover, I already studied in the USA in 2008. I attended Berkeley summer session course ‘English as a second language’ and got my EST Diploma. Also I would like to let you know that I am a disabled person. I have no left hand and I usually wear an artificial limp. So I would like to know if I could apply for financial aid or social security benefits in your college.
I would appreciate any information that you could provide me with.

Sincerely,
Katherine Grebenyuk

[Gillnetter]

Hello!
My name's Kathy and I would like to apply to the US college next year. As I am a foreigner I need to get lots of information about the whole application procedure. And I need them to answer my letter so it should be perfectly correct. That's why I'm asking you to check my letter.

Here it goes.

Dear Sir/Madam,
I am writing to inquire about applying to Antelope Valley College as an international student. I would like to ask for information about special terms and conditions of application and admission for international students. I would appreciate if you could provide me with a step-by-step application procedure guide.
I would be grateful if you could also review my case. I am a Russian student at the Russian State University for the Humanities. I’m getting (I would write, "I plan on receiving...") my Information Security bachelor’s degree next June. So I’m planning to apply to your college ("So" should not be used this way. Because you are receiving a degree does not mean that the next step is to attend a particular college.). Moreover, I already studied in the USA. In 2008 I attended the Berkeley summer session course, ‘English as a second language’, and got received my EST Diploma. Also, I would like to let you know that I am a disabled person. I have no left hand and I usually wear an artificial limp a prosthetic limb. So I would like to know if I could apply for financial aid or social security benefits in at your college.
I would appreciate any information that you could provide me with.

Sincerely,
Katherine Grebenyuk

Gil

[Katue]

Thanks a lot, Gill!