I need help

[venerupis]

This is the first I write in the forum, I hope you can help me as I am taking my proficiency exam in september and I am a disaster when writing and speaking.. I would appreciate it if you could correct my writings. Thank you everybody.

Task: I’ve been doing a course in England for three years and now a friend wants to join it. I have to write a reference letter for him. Thank you! (I attach the short note for my friend in order to be corrected too)

My address without name

27th August 2007

Dr. Flode
College address

Dear Mr. Flode, ((should I write Dr. Flode instead??))

I am writing in response to your letter requiring me to write ((repetitive…)) a reference to John Kino in order to be accepted in --- College.

Having completed the course myself during the last academic year ((or course?? or both??)) I feel that John has plenty of good qualities that, from my point of view ((or standpoint, which is better?)), would help him to complete the whole three-year course if he were to be admitted in the faculty ((remote possibility in order not to seem arrogant??)).

John is an admirable person who was doing a voluntary work in Rwanda for a whole year in 2006. As a consequence of this amazing experience he possess an instinct for ((??)) adaptation, which will help him to learn English quickly achieving the desirable fluently in spite of his low level nowadays. Join this feature to his physical courage, his diligent attitude and his great integrity and you get not only a good student, but also a good partner. Furthermore John is quite out-going and has lived independently for three years so far, what makes improbable that he will manifest the characteristic loneliness and homesickness, which most foreign students suffer from.

By and large, John is a youngster full of intelligence, good manners and willing to learn what will probably help him to succeed in spite of the heavy workload on the course and the frequent exams.

Yours sincerely,

My complete name

My address

27th August 2007

Dear John,

Thank you for your letter but Dr. Flode had already written me personally asking for your reference letter (I send it to you so you can tell me if is right for you).

Don’t worry about asking my help, we’ve been friends for years and I appreciate that you think of me when you need something.

I hope you have good luck, as I’m sure you’d be perfectly able to pass all the exams.

Best wishes,

Name

[Barb_D]

My address without name

27th August 2007

Dr. Flode
College address

Dear Mr. Flode, ((should I write Dr. Flode instead?? - yes))

I am writing in response to your request to provide a reference for John Kino to be accepted in --- College.

Having completed the course is it a course or a program? to me, a course is one class that is part of an overall program myself during the last academic year, I know that John has all of the qualities that [, from my point of view ((or standpoint, which is better?)) - point of view is the better of the two, but I would delete it] would help him to complete the whole three-year course if he were to be admitted in the faculty ((remote possibility in order not to seem arrogant?? If he were to be is fine)).

John is an admirable person who was doing volunteer work in Rwanda for a whole year in 2006. As a result is more natural to me of this amazing experience, he possess an instinct for adaptation. This will help him learn English, quickly achieving the desirable fluently in spite of his current modest level of proficiency.

Sorry -I'm out of time. I will try to come back to add more comments.

[venerupis]

Thanks for the corrections, in the task was said you'd been doing a course of three years in england so I didn't changed the word. I supposed it was referring to studies in the faculty or something like that....

[DIPESH PALEJA]

DEAR SIR/MADAM,
I understood the way of writing a letter (both formal and informal).But the problem with me is that I want you to provide me some new and uncommon sentences.for eg: WE Generally write "sorry for wasting your time" in the end of the letter.So I want you to provide me some simple and innovative sentences.kindly help me.

Thank you. Yours faithfully,
DIPESH PALEJA

[Anglika]

Originally Posted by DIPESH PALEJA

DEAR SIR/MADAM,
I understood the way of writing a letter (both formal and informal).But the problem with me is that I want you to provide me some new and uncommon sentences.for eg: WE Generally write "sorry for wasting your time" in the end of the letter.So I want you to provide me some simple and innovative sentences.kindly help me.

Thank you. Yours faithfully,
DIPESH PALEJA

Welcome to the forums.

It will be better if you start your own new thread with your question.

You will find phrases of this kind here: Business Letter Writing Basics
AskOxford: Phrases for Business Letters