Business letter--problem resolution

[Zoe2008]

5,832 pcs of PD5098 were inspected yesterday and result was pending, due to the earphone jack was in black color which was not match with the golden sample as silver. After checking with our record, the phone jack was changed from silver (metal) to black (plastic) since end 2005. However we did not update the golden sample and still kept 2004 version which is caused SGS confused.

We are so sorry for our carelessness and would like to send one sample for your sign back and return to the factory for inspection reference in future. The EMC report will be updated to your engineer dept ASAP. Would you please release shipment for us to catch vessel closing on 29 May? Waiting for your promptly reply.

[Neillythere]

Hi Zoe

5,832 pcs of PD5098 were inspected yesterday and referred back to us, as the earphone jack is black and doesn't match the standard (silver coloured) sample.

After checking our records, it appears that the silver (metal) phone jack was changed to black (plastic) at the end of 2005. We did not, however, update the standard sample, which remained as per the 2004 version, which is why SGS were confused.

We apologise for the error and would like to send a new sample for your approval, signature and return to the factory as the inspection reference for the future.

An updated EMC report will be sent to your Engineering Dept ASAP.

Meanwhile, could you please release the shipment, so that we can meet the 29 May deadline for loading on the vessel?

Waiting for your promptly reply.
Many thanks.

Hope this helps

[Zoe2008]

Hi Zoe

5,832 pcs of PD5098 were inspected yesterday and referred back to us, as the earphone jack is black and doesn't match the standard (silver coloured) sample.

After checking our records, it appears that the silver (metal) phone jack was changed to black (plastic) at the end of 2005. We did not, however, update the standard sample, which remained as per the 2004 version, which is why SGS were confused.

We apologise for the error and would like to send a new sample for your approval, signature and return to the factory as the inspection reference for the future.

An updated EMC report will be sent to your Engineering Dept ASAP.

Meanwhile, could you please release the shipment, so that we can meet the 29 May deadline for loading on the vessel?

Waiting for your promptly reply.
Many thanks.

Hope this helps

Hi Neillythere,

Appreciate for your great help!

There is some points, I was not understand, can you teach me, they are
1) silver colored - why color add "ed" ?
2) it apperans .... - can I use we found that ..... instead of it apperans ?
3) We apologise for the error - can I use carelessness instead of error ? or other word instead it ?

Thanks to advice

Regards
Zoe

[Neillythere]

Hi Zoe

1) silver coloured - a standard, silver-coloured sample.
We wouldn't say: "a black & white colour dog" but
we would say: "a black & white coloured dog"
Note that "color" is AmE, whereas "colour" is BrE.

2) it apperars .... - can I use we found that ..... instead of it apperars? Yes.

3) We apologise for the error - can I use carelessness instead of error ? or other word instead it ?
I wouldn't recommend it, as it sounds like incompetence, rather than an oversight. You could use oversight, which is better than "error".

Regards
NT

[RonBee]

Waiting for your promptly reply.

That should be:

Waiting for your prompt reply

I can't help but wonder if you are suggesting that the person should reply promptly. Wouldn't it be better to close with something like "Sincerely yours"?

[Neillythere]

Hi Ron

Yes, I agree. Many apologies, I just copied the original, without change.

Re; "Sincerely yours" - If it's done by email, I would personally never use "Sincerely yours", which I would reserve for a formal "hard copy" letter/fax.

In emails, I normally use "Regards" if I am passing on information and "Many thanks" if requesting action. But that's just my particular style.

Best regards
NT

[Snowcake]

I agree with you. And I suppose it is common to keep an email less formal than a letter. Usually you start an email with a simple 'Hello' and close with 'Regards'.
(We are) looking forward to a prompt/early reply / hearing from you soon, or 'We hope to hear from you shortly' would be a bit more polite than 'Waiting for a prompt reply'. But that's just me.

Hi Ron

Yes, I agree. Many apologies, I just copied the original, without change.

Re; "Sincerely yours" - If it's done by email, I would personally never use "Sincerely yours", which I would reserve for a formal "hard copy" letter/fax.

In emails, I normally use "Regards" if I am passing on information and "Many thanks" if requesting action. But that's just my particular style.

Best regards
NT

[Zoe2008]

Hi Neillythere,

Thank you so much to let me learn more !!

Regards
Zoe